Sex???

[hazeleyes]

I met this guy online, and we spoke online for hours. We live in different states and at first it was just a fun thing. I didn't take anything he said seriously since it was mostly about sex. He even asked me if I would have sex with him when I went on vacation to his city and I said ''ok whatever'' thinking I'll never meet him, it won't happen anyway. Well now I'm leaving to go there in 2 weeks and we're supposed to meet. Now the problem is I'm starting to really like this guy and he says he really likes me too, and I do want to sleep with him now, since it has been a while and a girl has needs , and even though he says he won't think differently about me, but i still have a feeling like I'll never hear from him again, and I don't want to seem easy to him. The last time I spoke to him, he said he knows that if I was treated right I can be very faithful, & I said that's true, so he said he'll treat me right, but never actually said ''be my girl.'' I don't wanna seem like I'm pushing anything, so I don't feel right asking him what did he mean. Now I'm just confused on what to do.

[ISTILLBELIEVE]

WHY BUY THE COW WHEN U CAN GET THE MILK 4 FREE? IF HE WANTS YOU HE'LL WAIT. & IT SOUNDS LIKE THAT "NEED" YOU HAVE RIGHT NOW IS MORE OF A STRONG DESIRE WHICH IS VERY UNDERSTANDABLE. BUT PLEASE DONT LET YOUR DESIRES, NO MATTER HOW STRONG, PUT YOU IN A POSITION WHERE YOU DONT GET WHAT YOU REALLY NEED! B WISE!
Proverbs 18:22 "The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD. ..."

[hazeleyes]

I can understand that, and I know waiting would be the right thing to do. It's not just a ''need,'' I am attracted to him, and if he is really sincere, then being with him wouldn't be a problem, but I don't know if he's lying just to get me to sleep with him. Plus there's also his profession, I'm sure he's around girls all the time. and we live over 10,000 miles away from each other, and though I have a apartment in his city, I don't live there anymore, so seeing him after this anytime soon won't happen. So that's why I'm having on hard time deciding on what to do.

[jenniferx]

Meeting online does not mean you someone well. Get to know him. For real.
(I suggest pepper spray for the justincase)

[Kaius]

Why would you? You like him yes, but sleep with him once, and having no possibility of future relationship?
He's not going to respect you for giving it up so easily. He just wants sex. I know you do too...
But I think you are better off NOT giving it.

[xxazurexx]

Sorry, but he doesn't sound sincere to me.

He wants to screw you, but meanwhile has gotta sweetalk you and to ensure he gets into your panties.

If you are up for a casual encounter with him, then go for it.

Don't expect to get anything else out of him.

[hazeleyes]

Why would you? You like him yes, but sleep with him once, and having no possibility of future relationship?
He's not going to respect you for giving it up so easily. He just wants sex. I know you do too...
But I think you are better off NOT giving it.

That's where I'm kind of stuck cause at first it was just supposed to be sex..nothing else. Now things are different. I want more. I'm not saying I love him or anything like that cause I haven't even met him in person yet, but I would REALLY like to get to know him better and possibly date him. But on the other hand, since I already said I would, I don't want to seem like some tease and talk all this stuff online & once I get there I change my mind. I have a close friend that told me they had spoke before online & he seemed like a real nice, respectful guy and he told me if I did decide to sleep with him to tell him he was my friend so I would get some respect. I actually felt bad because I don't want to have to say I know someone to get respect, but I told him and he ended up speaking to him about me that night. He didn't want to tell me what they said, all he said was it was nice & respectful things, so that made me think maybe he wants more too.

[xxazurexx]

^^Do you believe EVERYTHING a man tells you/says?

How old are you?

[hazeleyes]

^^Do you believe EVERYTHING a man tells you/says?

How old are you?

Of course not, that's why I'm having doubts. I've even told him before that he's good and got game because he has me believing him and doing things that I would never do with someone I don't know. He says he's not gaming me and he really likes me, not that he would admit it if he was. I guess it's because I want to believe him that's making the choice hard for me. I'm 21.

[xxazurexx]

Of course not, that's why I'm having doubts. I've even told him before that he's good and got game because he has me believing him and doing things that I would never do with someone I don't know. He says he's not gaming me and he really likes me, not that he would admit it if he was. I guess it's because I want to believe him that's making the choice hard for me. I'm 21.

Thing is, you know absolutely nothing about this man. You have never met him in real life, don't know anything about his real life circumstances - he could be married with 2 kids for all you really know or have some gf who is knocked up with a child.

It is wise to NEVER trust anyone online and to take everything that somebody tells you with a pinch of salt.

This guy is not sincere and he is looking for sex.

When all men will talk about is sex, when they actually ask you to have sex (like he did), I'm sorry but SEX is all he has on his mind and SEX is all he will offer and SEX is all you will get.

His sweetalking is a prelude, to aquire the sex.

Like you said, he isn't exactly going to say he is gaming you, or that he doesn't want a relationship, etc, etc.....he knows he wouldn't get the sex, were he to say these things.

Get wise for gods sake...and don't allow some man you have never met to use you like some prostitute to satisfy his need and then cast you aside like you are a rag doll! Because I'm betting that is what is gonna happen, in this scenario....like the many other thousands of women who thought they had met Prince Charming online before you.

[Kaius]

girl you are too young to be wrapped up in this. Don't do it because you may regret it later.
I might be crazy, but I know a decent guy would not ask to sleep with your without being in love with you first.
Sex is on the mind of all men....but the difference is, decent men attach sex with emotions and love.
Don't settle for less.

[Gigabitch]

He's just looking for a piece of ass. Watch out for his wife while you're selling yourself cheap.

[Cosmo]

I've never met anyone online that I didn't want to just use for something. Take from that what you will. The internet is anonymous, you can say or do anything with no strings attached. It's easy to talk dirty to a picture on a screen.

I mean, in highschool I had an MSN group called "Random internet girls used for beaking and ass". Don't get me wrong, I developed a few genuine friendships with some of them. And a few of them were actually people I had met in town but were sort of like casual long distant relationships. I needed an ego boost at that time, so having a stranger find me attractive enough to give me strip shows was a HUGE ego boost (there are websites that charge for this kind of action nowadays). Even I had the decency to not meet these girls for a quick bang. I was a real prick back in the day, but sex still meant something.

[hazeleyes]

You are all right. I shouldn't jump into things, even though he's not some random guy that just messaged me on AIM or Yahoo. I had him on my friend list for a long time because I requested him since I knew who he was, just never spoke to him before this. Still, he's probably full of shit & I'm just someone to gas his ego up to see if he could get me. Ahh well..I'll still meet him & see what's up, but unfortunately I'll guess I'll have to wait on the sex

[VincenzoG91]

He's going to be resentful if you promised him sex and don't deliver. I'm not saying that you should, just pointing out that he now has a certain expectation. Before meeting up, you should talk openly with him about your intentions. He might not feel like meeting up anymore.