Confused and tired

[mrsaddlebronc]

Hey everyone, i'm brand new to the site so i thought i'd get ya'lls opinion and advice about something right off the bat. first thing i am 23years old and haven't been in a relationship since high school. Everyone always tells me that i'm a really good looking guy and have a great personality and they don't get why i dont have a gf. I'm really shy i guess lol. Anyways about a month and a half ago, i met this amazing gal. She is 21 and is a sister of one of my friends. First night we met it was in a bar and it seemed that we hit it off right away we were both going back and forth asking each other questions about one another so everything seemed awesome. turns out she had just broken up with her bf the week before and she lives a good 3 hours away from where i live. since the first night i met her i have not been able to stop thinking about her, only problem is, is i don't know if shes into me or not. When I see her in person (twice now, she doesnt get back home very often) shes very talkative and seems to want to find out more about me, but yet when i try to talk to her on the internet she never has anything to say and i always have to initiate the conversation. her sister tells me that last week her ex bf and her went out on a date but has no idea if she told him off or has other plans. my question to anyone with any adivice is where should i go from here, or what can i do to get her more interested and keep in mind im fairly shy and have zero experience with relationships. thanx ya'll i appreciate ya taking the time to read through this.
Kody

[tjbella]

I'm not sure if I should be giving you advice as I'm fairly hopeless with relationships myself, but it sounds like she's got a lot on her plate at the moment and is trying to make the transition into single life which is never easy. I think the best thing that you could do for her is to be her friend right now. The beginning of any relationship is a very selfish decision. You see something you like and you want it. Be friends with her, spend time with her when she is around, be there for her. Let her sort her life out before trying to start anything.

[Cloud206]

Same here,start as friend, in this situation a friend is more needed than a lover.

[cmacattack1]

I guess you could be her friend, but if you are doing all the initating, is this really a one sided friendship?

While her and her boyfriend have broken up last week, they aren't totally over, regardless of what she says. Breaking up is actually a stage of a relationship (as crazy as it sounds) and her feelings are going to be with him still. She's not ready to be with somebody else, and yet she doesn't want to be alone. That is why they have a tendency to end up going back. Have belief in the fact that if they have been broken up, but not long enough to really change, that they are logically going to be broken up again in the future. You can be a friend through this, though you run the shot of being in the friend zone. Especially if you are the nice guy that listens to her and is her emotional tampon through all this.

If you like her as more, I wouldn't settle for less. She has a way to reach you and if she likes you and wants to talk to you, she will. Leave her be, let her drama unfold, and you may end up hearing from her. Just my opinion.

I can be a very shy guy too, so I know where you are coming from. A little confidence couldn't hurt. I get that vibe that maybe you don't have that if you need verification from others that you are good looking and a great guy. She's not the only gal out there, don't you worry, even if it's been a while.