sshe feels like she is walking on eggshells-why?help me

[don't bore me]

don;t understand what she means when she says she feels like she is walking on egg shells,I know she is kind of touchy about what words you say and can change moods in a sec. but I have never yelled ,got mad,or said I was leaving her in the year we have been together,only one time I got mad in the year we have been seeing eac hother,so I just don't get this and need to get a handle on it.this is mostly when she has been when she has had a few drinks,but it happens often so,need to know.she has pmms and i try to track the dates but it seems it can be anytime of the month.

[Gigabitch]

Sounds like you should be the one walking on eggshells.

In fact, I'll bet she heard this from someone before and is now using it on you when she's the one with the temper problem.

[bloodtippedrose]

if she is the one flipping moods and taking offense to what youre saying instead of digesting the MEANING of what youre saying, then yeah, youre the one walking on egg shells!!

sounds to me like she is pulling a little defense mechanism called projection

"in which someone attributes thoughts, feelings, and ideas which are perceived as undesirable to someone else. For example, someone who harbors racist ideas while believing that racism is socially undesirable might come to believe that a friend is racist, projecting his or her racism onto the other person."

Like.. I dunno.. her saying that shes walking on eggshells bacause YOU could flip moods or snap any second when its in fact the other way around..

[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_projection]Psychological projection - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia[/url]

[don't bore me]

Sounds like you should be the one walking on eggshells.

In fact, I'll bet she heard this from someone before and is now using it on you when she's the one with the temper problem.

and in fact,ya your right,she always seams to get mad about a very llittle thing and ends up going home,she'e 37 and sometimes I wounder what happend in the past to make her like this?I always have kept my cool when she leaves,just a 1/2 mile away,she cools down and everything is ok after a bit.not sure why she is like this sometimes?need to get a handle ion it.

[Gigabitch]

I'm going to venture a guess that what's happened in the past is that people have put up with her shit, just like you.

[don't bore me]

thanks blood
Like.. I dunno.. her saying that shes walking on eggshells bacause YOU could flip moods or snap any second when its in fact the other way around

she says I tend to be condsending,I have tryed to watch my p"s and Q's maybe she takes my wrong sometimes.have really tryed in the last few weeks.

[don't bore me]

Sounds like you should be the one walking on eggshells.

In fact, I'll bet she heard this from someone before and is now using it on you when she's the one with the temper problem.

temper she has,thats for sure,even before I was dating her,friends told me to look out.have talked to herabout it nad have only seen it a few times in the yr. we have been dating.

[bloodtippedrose]

personally I dont think shes worth all this effort. No one should have to pussyfoot around in a relationship, it should instead be open and honest. she should be taking what you say into consideration and KNOWING what you mean instead of taking everything the wrong way. She is doing it unknowingly on purpose because she is used to feeling like shit and if youre not treating her that way then she has to make something up.

[don't bore me]

thats why in asking this,want her to relax. im not going anyplace.love her.

[bloodtippedrose]

I guess the only thing you can do is tell her "I love you and dont want you thinking youre on eggshells around me so if I start doing something that makes you feel that way then tell me and we can talk about it" or when she starts getting huffed up over a word you said that she took wrong then dont let her get emotional about it, talk to her right then and there to find out what the problem is. Its all about calmly communicating, that way she might reveal what the issues ACTUALLY are

[don't bore me]

I have tryd loving her her when she gets upset asking her what did I say that upset her,wanted to talk about it.guess no matter,she left me last night. will start a thread as to what happended soon.maybe she will call me ?

[bloodtippedrose]

Okay maybe what she was doing was making excuses all along so you guys would break up. I wouldnt count on her calling you and there isnt much you can do if her mind is already set.