Don't know what to do at this point...

[One84]

Her and I have been going out for about 4 months now...3 months of them were great...we were going on about 3/4 nights a week, we always found ways to be together and hang out...

Now she's a very busy person, most of the time she can only hang out at night...work, friends, family take up otherwise time...so we would usually hang out at night...

When about months hit we started to bicker about things...many times over the little tiniest things...we would be fine afterwards though...

But the last couple weeks she started being fairly distant...pretty much saying she was too busy to see me but we talked everyday on the phone...

Eventually it seemed like it was even a bother for her to talk to me or even text me....so one day I asked her if she would be busy that night for a talk on the phone...told her through a text msg...she request what about and then decided to come over right away to talk about it...

So she came over and I let her know my feelings...that thought we weren't see each other as much, that we were drifting apart and that we should try seeing each other more or things probably won't work out....well she got all defensive saying she don't think that's the case at all, she's very busy right now (got new puppy, moving out...extra work hours), saying what you think don't want to see you, phone calls she be good enough for me, and she said she thought was threating her...if she don't find time to see me, will break up with her.....well explained to her that wasn't the case, just wanted to see her, she said she believe me...told her promised to meet a friend very soon and she left...seemed things were fine...

Later that night text her to see how she was doing...how the packing was doing for the very soon move in...and she exploded on me saying she was very pissed and doesn't take lightly to someone threating her...she's building her future and doesn't want someone getting in the way of that...and she won't change.....called her up right away, tried to explain to her that wasn't what was trying to say to her....she said I said what I said...she don't believe me, but she don't care.....she then asked me OK let's blow the gasket....asked what I truly feel about her....

Well up until the last 3 weeks I finally realized I had fallen in love with her and was waiting till the right time to tell her...but there was never a right time before that.....so I told her right then and there that I fell in love with her....she never really said anything...so told her if she wants to end it, just tell me...said she didn't...she told me to text her tomorrow and we softly said goodnight...

Next day text her how she was doing mid afternoon and had some good news to tell her about myself...she gave me one and two word answers....so I figured ok she don't want to talk...she wants space...so left her alone for space...

Well the next day she sends me a text at 11 at night asking how I am...tell her good just saw a baseball game heading on my way home now but talk after get home....she says she will probably be asleep by then...so text talk tomorrow...says I guess so....so ask her if everything ok....she says no, feels we are drifting apart in every aspect!!!....couldn't believe it....she said she had an aweful day and was wondering if I was going to throw away all we built away.....said no and in clear words...I love you...want this to work out and willing to put the continued effort in to make it work, do you feel the same way?........she said felt the sad, hurt, and felt the same way about me...but she had it and was going to bed....so didn't text back...left it was pissed....figured if someone cared about that person, that would be enough and they'd be happy...so thought it was over....

Next morning get a text from her saying she was stubborn and sorry...she cares for me and wants it to work.....hours later decide to text her back saying just want to spend more time with her and just want to work her to find a way to make it happen....she laughs and she's want think don't want to?...ok will talk to you later....so say ok ttyl

So time goes along and nothing for a couple days...well have to go to her work to pick something up and she seems totally disinterested in talking with me...we talked a little of course saying she's going a way for the weekend for her work and that's about it....

Well that was it...that night wrote her a huge note and emailed it to her telling her how much a felt about her and that was my last ditch effort....she reads the note that night and tells me she feels exactly the same way....cares for me so so much and didn't think was hurting that much....she's when she goes so busy she tends to ignore people and she doesn't mean to do it....said didn't understand why she told me before...she said sorry and we said goodnight....

The next morning before she left to go away for the work related weekend....she said she loved me and we'd talk when she got back....

Well she gets back and she's as distant all of a sudden as she was before...if it wasn't for me asking how she is doing we wouldn't have talked on phone last night telling me how her weekend went...which was great....and today had to go into her work to get something, we talked a bit everything seemed good, but then she said wanted to pick up a couple movies she forgot at my place and wanted them back...she would text me later and come up and pick them up........she never text me all day after and now it's 2am in the morning...she "forgot" I guess to do this.....

I seriously don't understand....she says she cares and loves me.....but everything else points to the fact she don't....feel like she has no respect for me out of nowhere.....what is a guy suppose to do? I know she is busy and not seeing anyone else....she is seriously busy as can be....but still she don't communicate with me at all......am I wrong here or what? Need advice....

Thanks...

[xxazurexx]

Seriously, you sound like a lovesick little puppy dog, trying desperately to hang onto something that doesn't seem to even exist anymore.
It's almost pathetic that you keep chasing this woman and when her actions speak 'loud and clear', that she is not interested anymore.
She's looking for a way out, only hasn't quite thought out how to escape it. I'm guessing she feels sorry for you and is feeling a sense of guilt, which is why she hasn't yet ended it totally, but she will.

[Charisma]

she sounds pretty weird to me. If she doesn't think yous are drifting, why say it wekks or months(not sure what she later said it) as if that's her own feelings.

In fact I would be blowing up about the whole *threating* her thing she comes out with. What is a relationship supposed to be, 2 people who never see each other?!?!

You can do better with a girl less distant and moody, who will make time for you, even if she's busy all the time. Not this stuff she's pulling.

[RdHrshyKss]

you guys are not right for each other. if she truly cared about you, she would go out of her way to make time to be with you. the first thing out of her mouth when you say you want to spend more time with her should not have been her freaking out at you...she would have been flattered and have talked about it with you in a much calmer and sane fashion. i agree with xxazurexx, she is no longer interested in the relationship and hasn't quite figured out how to end it, so she is stringing you along until she figures it out.

i know you say you love her, but your best bet would be to end it. you've only been dating for 4 months and this is happening already? she's lost interest. it's a no brainer, you need to let go and move on...