Strange signals

[Jam3s]

Hi all!

I recently began a long distance relationship and it has seemingly been going quite well. We had a very long and open discussion about the difficulties of pursuing it due to the distance etc etc but both eventually decided it was something we thought was worth the risks. So my feelings after that discussion was that it's something she really wants given what she said etc etc.

Now the strange part. She doesn't like clingy and neither do I which is great but I still send her a message over fb once a day just to ask how she is going etc etc but I have noticed recently that she will reply to others messages and more or less forget mine until maybe a few hours later or so if at all, however if she does reply it's usually the whole "look forward to talking to you <3" stuff.

When she comes online (we usually chat and video chat over msn) she never seems overly excited to talk and I pretty much need to keep the conversation going. However she always wants to video chat and when we do she seems to get more excited and want to chat more and all that jazz.

So it's strange, on the outside it almost appears like she is not that interested however during and after a chat on msn it still seems like she is really excited about it.

Perhaps she is almost testing me? Is she ignoring my fb posts to intentionally strain things a little to judge my reaction and reinforce that this is something which could work (we both told each-other it would be difficult and would have to go lengthy periods without contact).

I guess my biggest concern is not doing enough to make her feel like I want this because I would be happy to forget the fb messages each day and just chat the few times a week we get the opportunity online but I am worried she will feel like things are dimming out and going nowhere or that I am not that interested.

Oh and she came after me as well so she knew the difficulties before I did.

Anyway I am probably looking into it far too much but that are just strange signals to me to seem disinterested one minute and the complete opposite the next. But as long as I know the latter is how she feels about it the majority of the time then I will not care, but I am worried she is second guessing herself quite a lot.

[gigigi4]

it could be that prefers to talk over the phone or video chat and doesn't like to communicate as much via facebook/msn/email. i'm like that, i don't like to chat on msn, email, facebook so i'll usually keep my responses to a minimum in those forums regardless of who i'm talking to, how i feel about them, etc. so maybe try to talk more on the phone or video, where she has seemed enthusiastic about talking.
i don't know, maybe you're over-analyzing a little because it's the start of the relationship, it's long-distance, and that can be a stressful situation. i don't think she's testing you- that makes her sound kind of manipulative if so.

[allsmiles]

Long distance relationships are hard but I know of at least one that is successful. I know of at least one other long distance relationship that is very stressful. It depends on the the level of contact that each are comfortable with. Until you feel secure It doesn't hurt to ask her if she likes you leaving messages on her face book. I'm in a new relationship where I have figured out that he won't text and only likes to talk on the phone. I look at my text log and he never replies it looks like I'm talking to myself. hahaha

[Jam3s]

Thanks for the replies guys. Spoke to her today in length and she has been avoiding a little because she was worried about how I would react to a rather large personal issue she has which she told me about today (and said not even her family or closest friends know but felt I needed to know) so I am certainly very grateful she shared it with me and it's not something which will affect my feelings for her (as hard as she seems to find that to believe for some reason).

But anyway, hopefully with that out in the open she will be less reluctant to chat etc. Thanks again!!