Did I Misinterpret Him?

[summer_scent]

Hi. I'm a newbie here and it feels great to share things about love here in the forum. I have been recently heartbroken. There was this officemate guy whom I thought likes me probably because we have become so close and would share thoughts, ideas and plans with each other. At first I didnt like him but was later on developed.Then recently when he had to transfer to another branch of our office, he revealed that he likes this other girl in the office. And when I heard that, I felt sick and my heart was hurt but I kept my cool and told him to approach the girl. But it was the opposite of what im feeling. Now I feel shy of why I thought of him liking me and felt so stupid with my feelings for him.


I was with Andrew in a team and there was no chance to able to work closely with each other at first. He was a conservative type of guy and my first impression of him was loyal, responsible, sensible and intelligent. There was another girl in our team who kept telling me that she wants to tell me a secret of Andrew. And that girl was close to him. At first I didn't mind about it, but later on the thought of him liking me was developed cause that girl kept asking us to be together cause anyway our age gap is small and we are both single. Another thing is, there was this other girl who likes him so much but he does not pay any attention to her. He would always talk with me. Then we got chance to sit beside each other in our office, the girl who was close to him said that probably he is happy cause he can sit next to me. that was just one of those things that made me thought about him liking me...At that time ive got some feelings already.


As seatmates we talk a lot, other people even think we are so close and that we are already a couple. I just kept saying no we are not cause we arent really. Each time we would talk he would share his life plans, his thoughts about things, etc. and I would do too. It just felt so nice to be able to talk with someone I think on the same level of mind with me, cause we share same values and stuff. There were also things he would just tell me and not to other people. Then when he was applied to be changed to another branch because eof a more promising career, he introduced me to an organization he was joining and I thought that this was his way of keeping in contact with me. I guess I thought too much...


there was this time just the two of us went out together because he was asking for help regarding something in the organization and I kept bugging about that thing he was gonna tell me. That's when he said he likes this other girl, whom he never showed any signs of liking when he was still in our branch. My stomach turned and I kept my reaction under control...and then I teased him about her and told him to go make a move and send a message to her. Which he did...he told me about it through sms. We again meet each other for the organization and said he would join an event of our office which I cant attend... and I teased him about her and he said he would keep me updated about what happened....So what was all that closeness we had? Am I just a friend...didnt he really feel anything for me....? why would he be so open to me and all...now I think I dont know how to think anymore of what guys show to a girl...? im just really heartbroken...anybody who has been in my shoes? Thanks for reading and I would appreciate any advice...

[Natlee]

From your post it seems like you are in the friend zone. He told you loads of stuff he hasn't to other people, he kept contact with you after he left and he is expressing feelings and updates on what is happening with another girl which shows you how much he thinks of you as a friend. If you did say that you liked him it could make your friendship awkward but depends if you can stand to be in a friendship with someone you like so much.

[Honest Adam]

You are in the friend zone and if you stay there you will find yourself as his "rebound girl" of choice one day. If you really like him you'll have to bite the bullet and tell him and risk the friendship or you'll have to keep it to yourself and try to feel differently. Tough situation, good luck,
Adam