What's my next move?

[lover-of-love]

After 6 months of no contact with my ex-girlfriend, we have started talking again. I want her back.

We've went out for drinks together and met for coffee on Tuesday. She knows my feelings for her but I don't want to pressure her. What should my next move be and when?

Thanks!

[Gigabitch]

Ask her straight up if she's considering the idea. Whether or not you want to pressure her, the pressure exists if she knows what you want. Find out what she wants. If she just wants to be "friends", you're wasting your time.

[Raze]

Never get involved with exes. You already messed up before you began by getting involved with an ex.

[lover-of-love]

Gigabitch, Thanks for your response.

I did ask her if she was considering it and her response was that it was that she couldn't even comprehend more than friendship at this point. She said it was too soon. Then she continued to say she wants to be friends and hang out this summer.

[Raze]

Like I said, don't get involved with exes. Leave her alone and find someone else.

[masu]

It's a risk. You need to consider many things, but in the end it will be a gamble. I guarantee she'll eventually come back to you to give it another shot IF AND ONLY IF:

1. She does not meet any new men
2. She feels no one else would take her

If she's an 8 or 9, forget her and move on because she will be getting attention from numerous guys. She says she wants to be friends for now just to see if she can get involved with other people. You have to decide if you want to be around when she tells you she met a new guy and may get involved with him. It's a 80/20 gamble I'd say. You have to decide if that 20% chance of her coming back is worth being around her when she gets a new man.

[lover-of-love]

Ok,

So what should my next move be? Should I ask her out to lunch? Coffee? Drinks? I'm leaving for vacation on monday for 3 weeks so theres not much time. Should I wait until after vacation? Should I not say anything and let her contact me?

[Kagerou]

An ex is an ex for a reason, is it really worth it to go for round 2?

[Gigabitch]

I think you're blowing your chance of getting her back in the future by Friendzoning yourself now.

[masu]

Yes, friendzoning is a major problem in this case, but again, it's only if she is meeting new guys or hangs around numerous guys. I guarantee, if she is the type of girl who doesn't go out to bars or clubs, and can't meet new people at school because it's summertime, you have a chance. If you are the only guy in her life she will take you back 100%. There are biological and psychological imperatives that trump everything. Of course, the relationship will most likely start off fake, but most relationships are fake like this to a certain extent.

Also, if you do end up in the friend zone, you can do a freeze-out for a year or more and then try again.

What you need to do in the meantime is try to meet many more women.