Help!!!

[lost_in_love]

I AM SO LOST. MY BOYFREIND AND I HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 2 YEARS AND IT HAS NOT BEEN AN EASY 2 YEARS. HE WILL BE 28 NEXT MONTH AND I JUST TURNED 23 THIS PAST MONTH. HE ALSO HAS A DAUGHTER THAT TURNED 4 ABOUT A WEEK AND A HALF BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY. SINCE HE AND I HAVE BEEN TOGETHER, WE HAVE BROKEN UP ABOUT 8 TIMES BUT WE ALWAYS EITHER GET BACK TOGETHER JUST HOURS LATER OR THE VERY NEXT DAY. THE REASONS FOR BREAKING UP WERE REALLY PETTY AND STUPID AND WAS JUST A REACTION OF ANGER. I CAN SAY, HOWEVER, THAT WE HAVE HAD WAY MORE GOOD TIMES THAN BAD BUT THE BAD IS REALLY BAD. SOMETIMES IT SEEMS AS IF HE FEELS LIKE THE ONLY PEOPLE THAT EXIST IN THIS WORLD ARE HIM AND HIS DAUGHTER. ALTHOUGH THE THREE OF US SPEND A LOT OF TIME TOGETHER, MOST OF THE TIME I FEEL LIKE A THIRD WHEEL. WE NEVER REALLY HAVE ANY ALONE TIME AND HE HARDLY EVER WANTS TO DO ANYTHING WITH ME OR FOR ME UNLESS IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH HIS DAUGHTER. I UNDERSTAND THAT THAT IS HIS CHILD AND I KNOW THAT SHE COMES FIRST IN HIS LIFE BUT I DONT WANT TO FEEL LIKE IM SECOND. I WOULD NEVER WANT TO COME IN BETWEEN HIM AND HIS CHILD. I JUST WANT A LITTLE BIT OF PERSONAL ATTENTION. HE TELLS ME ALL THE TIME THAT HE IS NOT HAPPY BUT IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME AND HE STILL WANTS TO BE WITH ME. I DONT REALLY KNOW HOW TO TAKE THAT. WHEN HE GETS ALL SAD AND DEPRESSED, HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK OR TELL ME WHATS WRONG AND HE PUSHES ME AWAY. HE GETS MAD AT ME FOR LITTLE THINGS BUT DOESNT REALIZE THAT HE DOES THE EXACT SAME THINGS THAT HE NAGS ABOUT. WHEN HE GETS MAD OR SAD, I AM IGNORED. THE ONLY TIME HE KISSES ME IS WHEN ONE OF US ARE LEAVING, DURING SEX, OR WHEN I ASK FOR A KISS. WHEN I ASKED HIM WHY HE CANT JUST KISS ME JUST TO KISS ME ON HIS OWN, HE TOLD ME THAT IT DONT BE ON HIS MIND AT THE TIME. WHO HAS TO REMIND THEMSELVES TO KISS SOMEONE... ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ARE IN THE OTHER PERSON'S FACE 24/7??? I JUST WANT HIM TO DO THINGS FOR ME AND WITH ME ON HIS OWN AND NOT BECAUSE I ASK HIM TO. IS THAT SELFISH OR OVERLY-DEMANDING OF ME? EVERYBODY WANTS TO FEEL SPECIAL SOMETIMES. BUT... WE DONT HAVE THESE PROBLEMS ALL THE TIME BUT WHEN THEY HAPPEN, THEY REALLY BUG ME. I REALLY LOVE HIM AND WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HIM. HE DOES TELL ME EVERYDAY THAT HE LOVES ME AND HE OFTEN SAYS THAT HE IS GOING TO MARRY ME AND THAT HE WANTS TO BUILD A FAMILY WITH ME. I DONT KNOW IF I COULD TAKE BEING A THIRD WHEEL FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE THOUGH. I DONT REALLY KNOW WHAT TO DO. I CANT IMAGINE MY LIFE WITHOUT THE TWO OF THEM. I LOVE HIS DAUGHTER AS IF SHE WERE MY OWN AND I DONT HAVE ANY KIDS OF MY OWN... YET. I GUESS ALL IN ALL, I JUST WANT TO KNOW IF IT IT WORTH HOLDING ON TO OR IF IM BEING SELFISH. HELP ME PLEASE.

[cheeze_guy]

The guys kid is the most important person in his life you can't even begin to try to be more important, even if you got to be just as important the kid is still more important. As for the affection, I personally can't be with a girl who pushes me away when I try to kiss her because I am very affectionate and love to show my girl I am into her. I find that when I am with a girl who doesn't like my affection the relationship doesn't last long because I need love and I love to give love and some people just suck at expressing there love and I am not down to fight for love that only I feel. Maybe it's true that some people have trouble expressing themselves but if I need a certain kind of love and am not getting it I feel I must move on.

[vashti]

They are a family, and you are - in fact - not. I don't mean this to sound harsh, but that is simply a matter of fact. If you don't like the way things are progressing, get out NOW. It never really gets any better. I know this from experience. Being a part of someone else's family is VERY challenging, and frequently not especially rewarding.

[xxazurexx]

BUT I DONT WANT TO FEEL LIKE IM SECOND. ...

Any man who would put a woman before his child, IMO doesn't and wouldn't deserve kids.

That kid is his flesh and blood....you are not.

Stop being so selfish and realise that there is someone who is more important to him and she always will be!