Mixed signals?

[eloro9]

So I posted this in the wrong forum I think. I realized I could use male and female input.


I don't normally do this kind of thing, but this is completely killing me. I'm a twenty year old male, going to school for pre-med. I work with a girl that is really confusing me. She and I have always been friendly with each other, and we talk a fair amount. I mean, I don't think I'm her best friend or anything, but we do talk and joke with each other a lot throughout the day. She does a fair amount of what I'd call flirting, but that's something I need help deciding on... whether it is flirting or not. I'll give a few specific examples... she smiles at me, and she squirted my shirt with a bottle of cleaner one day (strange I know, not the first time she has done things like that. Once she was walking by and lit a lighter right next to my nose...) she asks for my help doing things sometime, which may just mean she needs help, I don't know really... lifting something heavy, etc. And today, I was leaning up against a rail, and she came up and leaned exactly like I was (we had to wait on something to do at the location, but the point is she mimicked my stance, which I think is some kind of subconcious body language, then she scratched her head and flattened her hair which I have heard is a sign of interest or nervousness or something.) Well all that is good I guess, but a couple months ago I friend requested her on facebook, and I'm pretty sure she ignored it. She may not have known it was me, but I'm not sure. Also, I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend. Before you tell me I'm a jerk for liking a girl with a boyfriend, let me say that I have been TRYING to not like this girl. I've been trying to cool it down, and back off. I just can't stop thinking about her, every waking moment! And the crazy thing is, she makes me WANT to be at work... and my work is hot, hard, and generally exhausting. I just would really like to know what all this means... I know people are all different, but some opinions never hurt. Thanks everyone.

[RoseJan1]

Okay, I have been in love with this girl for like 3 years. She knows. She is all the time sending me mixed signals. She will flirt with me, but when I ask her out, her reply is that I am in Iraq. (yes, i am an army soldier, currently deployed to iraq) I am a little confused by these mixed signals and I can never get a straight answer from her, what do i do?

[lanana.banana]

why not just ask her what the deal is. tell her you added her on fb a while back. ask her if she has a bf. she'll get it if you put those questions out there. just cos there is a goalie (bf) doesnt mean that you can;t score. she will decide if she wants anything to happen with you.

[eloro9]

Well yeah I know I could always do that... but I was trying to get some more opinions on what exactly all these signals mean before I just take the plunge. I wanted to be prepared before I take a huge risk... because honestly I do like this girl as a friend too and I wouldn't want to ruin any chance of further friendship or to completely creep her out.

[girl68]

you can't honestly ask a forum or all your friends if you should ask a girl out or not. just take the damn plunge have a little bit of confidence.

[eloro9]

Well yeah I know... honestly I'll probably end up asking her out in the end anyway... because I don't like to live my life with regrets... but I mean... Some other opinions would be nice. I can't tell what this girl is thinking, and that's strange because I usually am pretty decent at it. I was just wondering if anyone else could offer insight as to what her behavior means.