I would like a woman's opinion on this.

[mj1086]

I'm a 23-year-old male who has never even kissed a girl. I was raised by very religious parents in a home where sex was never mentioned. My parents even made us cut off contact with some our cousins after they got pregnant in high school. When I was ten years old my mother told me that because of "my" religion (i have since stopped believing) , I would never be allowed to have a girlfriend. This made me feel like a freak and my pattern of social withdrawal can be traced back to that. Whenever a girl liked me I had to pretend that I wasn't interested, even if I was. She reminded me of this again when I was fifteen, after I had mentioned that a female friend, we'll call her "Mia", had asked me to go to the movies with her. I had very strong feelings for Mia but I could never tell her. I didn't realize it then, but Mia had feelings for me, too. I haven't seen her in four years and she recently said to me on facebook, "I still love you." I still have feelings for her. She is under the impression that I had no interest in her. I really want to be with her but I'm just so afraid of her reaction when she realizes the obvious: that I have absolutely no experience with women. I've even withdrawn from all my friends because of this secret I am hiding. The only person that really knows me is my therapist.

People tell me that I'm good-looking and everyone says I'm hilarious, including Mia, who laughs at every frickin thing I say. I can honestly say that I am ashamed of my lack of experience with women. It makes me feel like the lowest of the low. I'm always afraid the topic of sex or dating will come up in a conversation, because I am hiding in plain sight and a conversation like that can expose me. Everyone just assumes that I'm a normal guy with a normal sex life, even my relatives.

I am so scared of her reaction. Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated

[sparkle_jello]

I'm a 23-year-old male who has never even kissed a girl. I was raised by very religious parents in a home where sex was never mentioned. My parents even made us cut off contact with some our cousins after they got pregnant in high school. When I was ten years old my mother told me that because of "my" religion (i have since stopped believing) , I would never be allowed to have a girlfriend. This made me feel like a freak and my pattern of social withdrawal can be traced back to that. Whenever a girl liked me I had to pretend that I wasn't interested, even if I was. She reminded me of this again when I was fifteen, after I had mentioned that a female friend, we'll call her "Mia", had asked me to go to the movies with her. I had very strong feelings for Mia but I could never tell her. I didn't realize it then, but Mia had feelings for me, too. I haven't seen her in four years and she recently said to me on facebook, "I still love you." I still have feelings for her. She is under the impression that I had no interest in her. I really want to be with her but I'm just so afraid of her reaction when she realizes the obvious: that I have absolutely no experience with women. I've even withdrawn from all my friends because of this secret I am hiding. The only person that really knows me is my therapist.

People tell me that I'm good-looking and everyone says I'm hilarious, including Mia, who laughs at every frickin thing I say. I can honestly say that I am ashamed of my lack of experience with women. It makes me feel like the lowest of the low. I'm always afraid the topic of sex or dating will come up in a conversation, because I am hiding in plain sight and a conversation like that can expose me. Everyone just assumes that I'm a normal guy with a normal sex life, even my relatives.

I am so scared of her reaction. Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated

Go for it, the longer you wait the weirder it will get. Have fun!

[ammi00]

^^ Exactly what she said. Try not to worry TOO much about it, because then you'll start fearing (that you won't know what to do, that you're not good enough, blah blah). Learn and experience together with this girl. Good luck!

[brookep]

You have to accept yourself and all the past that comes with you. You can't undo it and you can't have a relationship built on dishonesty. The woman that will love you will accept your inexperience. Hopefully Mia will be understanding, but if she isn't then what else about your person will she not accept?