Still utterly confused by everything

[spiritofjosh]

I posted awhile ago about me and now ex of 5 years broke up for a bunch of reasons that were my fault (no cheating or other girls) and now I'm more confused then ever. I mentioned after we broke up she still wanted to be "seeing" me and we kissed and etc and she said she wasn't interested in finding another person and this was true because I proved this myself. But anyway we got in a small fight and this brought me to say that 2 years ago while we were broken up for 6 months I dated another girl and told her who she was which I've never told her. At the time she was upset I never told her before but didn't seem to take it that bad because after wards we texted that night and she told me she still loves me and everything will work out. Two days later her facebook said she was in a relationship and wouldn't answer me or another mutual friend. And her girlfriend texted me saying she has a boyfriend and to leave her alone. I did just that and doubted she had a boyfriend because it didn't make any sense to me and I couldn't find out who. She deleted her facebook and I haven't said a word to her in 3 weeks. A few days ago she texted my best friend whose also a really good friend of hers (even though she hasn't spoken to him since we broke up until now) and asked him about some car and then called him again the next day but he didn't answer because she was in school. And last night I was a little drunk and he told me that he was talking to somebody, I don't remember much of what he said but that they told him they don't think she has a boyfriend either because they talked to her. So now I'm really confused about why she would lie to me like that and why she would all of a sudden want me to leave her alone after saying everything would work out? Maybe she looked up the girl I dated on facebook and saw I wrote some stuff? It really just doesn't make any sense to me. And I've been trying to move on but every other girl I talk to ends up interested in me and after a while they just make me miss my ex even more because no offense to all the other girls (being around 4 or 5 at this point) they don't live up to my ex and I can't shake that feeling. Any help would be great and I apologize for the length.

[Agape]

Sounds like your ex can't move on, she is playing all these little games . . . so forget about her and move on

As for you comparing new girls to your ex, unfortunately that is only natural - especially considering that this was 5 years. . . was she your first?

[spiritofjosh]

First long term, most others were just like a few months and even then I only felt attraction, no real romance. When I started dating her it was completely different and the same with her, we would get in stupid fights and break up but something always brought us back. When I dated the other girl for like 2 months while me and my ex were broken up I still only felt attraction and every minute I spent with her made me think more and more about my ex and one day she just came around after I decided to message her on myspace saying I missed her. And I dated the other girl 4 months after me and my ex broke up, within the second month dating the new girl I was back with my ex and everything was great until recently. I guess I just dwell on it so much because I have this mystery of if she's dating or not...I'm the type who can't move on unless I know who shes dating because of how much I care about her. And I know these games she's playing are immature but in a sick way it makes me miss her more because if it is some huge game is guess it's her own way of saying she misses me...if that makes any sense. But moving on is on my to-do list.