Are these signs a man is interested?

[VincenzoG91]

Bill Clinton? How does my story remind you of him? He seemed to be getting laid left and right.

Yeah, but he's more famous for molesting an intern than for having sex with his own wife.

[YouAreBeautiful]

Hi Crystal, I'm sorry I haven't been around the forums for a while. I was taking a break from the computer over the holidays. How did it go with the desserts? I think feeding them to him would be a great, flirtatious, but safe move. It would have been a great thing to do just before Thanksgiving. If you haven't done it yet, I think the Christmas holiday could provide a great "reason" to bring in the treats =)

[Crystal99]

Hi to all.

I have not posted in over a month. BTW I brought in the fruit tartlets and he loved them. He thought it was very sweet that I shared it with him. I don't know if you remember my story of me an the university professor, tough some of you may ( I am sure Vincenzo does LOL). Well, I am no longer an INTERN. I have a job in another dept and don't have to worry about the prof-student issue. I wanted to give him a Xmas card and the words I want to write are truly genuine and from the bottom of my heart. I feel comfortable writing this since we have already talked about life, personal problems, joke around with each other etc. Tell me if you think it is ok:

"To one of the most respectable, admirable, and wonderful people that I have ever met. I truly appreciate all you do in the dept. for us and everything you have done for me. WIshing you a Merry Xmas and a new year in which you will get everything you want and deserve.

My guy friends tell me that men really want respect and admiration ( two things that I show this man already). Do you think this is ok to write? is it bordering flirting a bit? ( I want it to just a bit). If not, tell me what else to add. Basically, I would like to flatter him a bit. What do some of the men think here? Would you like it if a girl wrote these words to you?

(Just to give you some background-yes it may be stroking his ego, but why the heck not? Also, he has done the same with different words, telling me I am a bit more special than others, talented, hot, beautiful, smart, and a dreamgirl). So, since he has already done this, this is why I feel I can reciprocate with words, in case anyone would think it is going overboard.

[VincenzoG91]

Now that you're no longer an intern there, go for it. One extra touch for the card that might make a difference is to enclose a photo of yourself.

[Crystal99]

Ok. Did the card, gave a box of homemade cookies and I got pleasant reactions. Listen to this-he was supposed to go to meet someone for lunch at around 11:30 am on the other side of campus and he stayed with me for over an hr talking. I went by his dept. at 11:10 or so and we talked and talked about classes, a conference he went to and relationships. He told me that he has been single for a couple of months (I guess it didn't work out). He seems very ambivalent and afraid. Told me when he was 25 he dated someone at another job and she hurt him bad and he eventually left the place. Then he's like, "it's hard to date where you work, people tell me to meet people here but I don't know...it can get messy...don't know."
I feel like he sooo likes me but something is keeping him back (he tells me he gets his heart broken all the time). I feel bad bc he is so great and it seems like he makes bad decisions. So, then he says, "the man that gets to marry you will be the luckiest man in the world."
Then, we talk about relationships and every time he brings up a typical problem in the relationship, he's like, "let's say you and I are a couple...." giving hypothetical situations. He did this like 3 times.

I don't know what to think! I am thinking just take it slow, be nice and sweet, and let a friendship develop over time-would you suggest this since he seems apprehensive and reluctant?

Over all, I am confused. Am I reading this the right way-that he has somewhat fallen for me but feels stuck and is reluctant bc of work?

[vashti]

of COURSE he is reluctant because of work. duh. He SHOULD be reluctant because of work. When you realize he isn't quite as special as you think he is (once your hormones calm down), he will be at risk for being dumped again.

[Crystal99]

Well listen lol,
I know that he is not perfect or so special. I see flaws but not bad ones like being an a-hole to people. It is not my hormones talking, I feel like I really care about the person, something that grew over time by observing his character and the way he treats people. It starte off as a mental interest that moved into an emotional one, anything physical interest came much later on.

I just want to proceed carefully and make him trust me.

[sookie6]

I say do what you want and what you feel like doing. It seems unfortunately we only learn through experience regardless of any sound advice we may receive.

You mentioned you had a very strict upbringing...time to make your own mistakes and to learn about relationships!

xx

[brahem]

DON'T cry over anyone who won't cry over you

that is the roul

[ianoulla]

Hi - it seems to me you won't know what his intentions are until you make a decision to go ahead. He may have cooled due to work pressures, or somebody noticing..... and he's backing off. You may realise that as he backed off, you want him more (maybe it's a game, please do bear this in mind). He may be a HOD, but that doesn't mean he's not capable of playing games. Then you have to deal with everything as it happens. I have come to realise that men like playing games, some are prepared to go beyond the game and get involved in something worthwhile. BUT....... be prepared....... he might just like the game. His professional position may indeed have some bearing on how he flits with you, so it's even more tantalising. You also, may not realise it, but maybe you enjoy the game of him flirting and chasing you....... the reality might be a let down.......

I have come to the conclusion, due to my own predicament and reading all sorts of postings on this website that in a world where easy sex and one night stands are 10 a penny, that somehow men and women seem to be going back in time and enjoying flirting, looking, the anticipation, rather more than real life relationships that may or may not work out. Nobody wants to be let down or disappointed or take a risk, so they seem to prefer to play games instead. I even heard of somebody having a 5 yr txting affair, no dates, no touching, no kissing, just txts!! Hope this helps...