dumping over a kiss?

[dodo]

Question to the guys :

I'm abroad for 4 months and am due to come back in 3 weeks. I've been in a relationship for about a year and a half. 8 months ago me and my GF took a break because each of us went on a trip and we wanted to experience new things. each of us was with other people while in this time. we rejoined near the end of the trip, traveled together and then I went to a different country to work. she went back(we're back together).

now we keep in touch twice a week via phone and now she tells me that she made out with her best male friend. she initiated it. she said that she was feeling lonely and knew he has feelings for her. she now regrets it but I suspect she as well has feelings for him.

she and him broke up all contact. I'm returning in 3 weeks. I still love her but I dont know if I can trust her anymore, should I let her go??

[Uap]

Well she did tell you about it and if you really like her the least you can do is wait till you get back.

[LissaP]

I say you let it go but make clear expectations moving forward. When you get back together in person make the most of your relationship.

[damn2010]

Address the issue if you want to stay with her. Make it VERY CLEAR this is unacceptable behavior. How would she like it if you went and made out with a female friend or co-worker "you had feelings for"? Tell her your trust in her has been damaged because of this.

[xxazurexx]

Just because she told you about it, doesn't and shouldn't excuse what she did.

While you may find it easy to forgive, it's a lot herder to forget and to trust again.

Up to you I guess.

[Kaius]

How can you ever trust her again? What if you have to go away to work for a few months and she gets lonely again? If her heart were with you, no other man would even be in her radar....no matter how attractive he was, or how lonely she was.
Women are not like men. They can be lonely, but remain faithful just fine. Men, on the other hand, have less self-control because of the "little head". I say you break up with her. Not worth the heartache.

[iZero]

Men, on the other hand, have less self-control because of the "little head".

Men have every bit as much self control. If a "man" can "get lonely" and stray, then he's no man at all. Period.

Anyway, it's really up to you and how you feel about it OP. She violated your trust, and only you can know how far she pushed it. But if you stay with her, like was already said, you really should set some very clear boundaries. But I agree. If her heart were with you, she'd have been unable to even fathom such contact with another person. You deserve - everyone deserves, someone that can be faithful to them regardless of circumstances that you find yourself in. There should be absolutely no reason to fear at all what your other half will do when you're away. If you have even the slightest worry about what they are up to, then something is not right.

[dodo]

She tells me that kissing him only made her realize that I'm the only one for her. I believe her but I don't know if things will ever be the same...

[doppelgaenger]

I would probably break up with her. Wouldn't waste any time for formalities.

[dodo]

I have to ask, what if she decided not to tell me, then wait a few months for it to cool off. then tell me. do you think it justifies her action by "not telling me so fast in order to save the relationship" ?

[devonbrown]

You two already separated once to "experience new things" and saw other people. You already determined the boundaries of this relationship... that they're sketchy. Find a new girl and stick with her.

[smackie9]

You two already separated once to "experience new things" and saw other people. You already determined the boundaries of this relationship... that they're sketchy. Find a new girl and stick with her.

Ya I have to agree. If you two were truly in love with each other then there would not have been a break. And well it's doomed anyway if this has already happened.