I think I have found the 'one'

[jamiecal77]

I have known this person for 8 months or so now,
i didnt really pay much attention to her to begin with, as I was
interested in someone else, she was always there and would say hi at any
given opportunity.

we share the same personality, sense of humour , quiet, modest
nervous but caring. we never used to talk that much, but
recently we have spent evenings talking for 3-4 hours, unlike
other females i've encoutered before, she spends time and seems
to show a genuine interest

she seems totally different, modest, caring considerate
always understanding, whenever we talk by messenger online
or email or text she always ends with "luv xxx" or "bye xxx"
we met a couple of times, a few weeks ago, and will see one another again soon
in a matter of days

I;ve said things like "nice warm hugs" and she has said "oh thanks " and been quite pleased that i care about her

but

she is only just 18, and I have just turned 27, I'm worried if (like i have done before) about actually coming out and saying "well should we go out together? or how do you feel about spending some more time together" or reveal my feelings that it would be
quite distruptive and upset the applecart as it were as she is quite shy and timid

I really dont want to lose, what we have and have built up in great friendship, trust
and caring thoughts.

what should I do?

[unMorph]

Option B - "how do you feel about spending some more time together"
Do not hide the fact that you might be interested in starting a relationship, but show her that you care about her enough to get to know her first. Also, take the attitude that you don't need to rush, there is all the time in the world. Develope the friendship first (ignore anyone who warns about the 'friendship zone') but remind her once in awhile, subtlely, that its all leading towards a 'relationship'. Think of it as relationship foreplay, hehe. Have fun with it, enjoy it. This is one of the best parts of a relationship, savor it like girl savors expensive chocolate.

[jamiecal77]

Relationship Foreplay, is a pretty good term to some the situation up, thanks for that.. Yes things are moving slowly, but very well, almost too well, that's why i dont want to spoil any chances or any opportunity i have here for something special.

thanks for the advice

[ran]

Cool! good terminology.

[King Zarathu]

remember that people change all the time. for you and her to be perfect for each other you would have to change the same at the same rate.. and not start bickering at each other after marriage and whatnot.

sometimes you get that feeling when they really aren't the one for you, i know it sucks.


try dating her and see how it goes

[jamiecal77]

we have never argued at all, not even once in 8 months

[King Zarathu]

there's a problem with not arguing. you have to argue at least ONCE in a while to show that.. well i dunno how to explain it, maybe somebody else can help me out with supporting ideas/opinions/explinations

[PoetsRevenge84]

Arguing is healthy when it doesn't involve punches being thrown or other equally harmful activity. lol When you argue, you get your true feelings out in the open when they may not have been expressed otherwise. It's perfectly healthy in small amounts and makes for a good relationship. Every good relationship has a time when you need to take a step back so that you can move foreward again. It's a complicated process that just goes on and on. I love it though. Without this process, I'd definitely get bored. I argue with my b/f every once in a while and it helps us to express out opinions and we get to make up later on if we even bother to stay mad at each other at all. Most of the time it just passes with a silly comment that makes us laugh it all off. I love my relationship. I am set for life with this guy of mine. I love him to death. :-)

[sleepy]

relationship foreplay = cool term

for jamiecal77, just spend more time with her in real life. ask if she just wants to see some movie rather than saying 'would you care to see me'. touch her often; flirt playfully, make her see you as a man...actually, i'm really just repeating what unMorph said. but he's right.

good luck!

[jamiecal77]

relationship foreplay = cool term

for jamiecal77, just spend more time with her in real life. ask if she just wants to see some movie rather than saying 'would you care to see me'. touch her often; flirt playfully, make her see you as a man...actually, i'm really just repeating what unMorph said. but he's right.

good luck!

cool, thanks well I meant serious arguement, we've often had banter and playful disagreements in fun, but nothing to the extent to upset each other or cause anger between us. It's an absolute pleasure and enjoyment to even talk to someone who is so considerate and spends time listening to you and following what you say, rather than short answers. It's great I'm really happy every day I get to speak to her - it seems so strange though, its like things are going too well, like God has decided one day "right here is the perfect match" * i know there maybe no such thing* but it feels so real and good

I did hug her the last time I saw, she looked quite nervous like she wasnt expecting it but she hugged me back., and we've got on really well since last meeting

I'm seeing her this weekend as she is at a party i'm going to with her friends, not to embarress her obviously infront of her friends, what could i say or do to show without much fuss or pretence that i feel for her and care a great deal about her, to find out if she really feels the same way.

[King Zarathu]

go be in love man enjoy life to the max.

my b/f

UR A GIRL!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!

hee hee i love you

*licks you*




.....hey, where's kanzaki?

[PoetsRevenge84]

UR A GIRL!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!

hee hee i love you

*licks you*

Yes, I'm a chick! Always have been. lol *is licked* O_O Hi? lol I thought it was obvious by the Sally icon and the reference to Sally and all that stuff that I was a girl. lol I guess I didn't make it too obvious? grrr... I hope other people don't think I'm a dude too! X_X *dies*

[King Zarathu]

how old are you and how big is ur rack?

heh.. so intrusive

[PoetsRevenge84]

O_O Oh my! lol So typical. Men! Oi! lol
I'm 19 (ill be 20 in Dec). How old are you?

[Fishy]

last I checked, he was ~16-18 but I could be wrong