Not sure what to do...

[Grimaldus]

Hi,
I'm new here to the forum. Greetings to all and excuse my english. I hope i can find some anwsers here.

So, I met this girl some months ago and we became really close and eventually we had a relationship. Now her parents have a problem for her to be in a relationship, but we have been hanging out together without them knowing whenever we had the chance (ussually 1-2 hours a week, which isnt much).

Now my first problem is that after I finish high school this year, I planned to go study in another country and she cant leave for the next 4 years untill she's 22 (her parents want her to finish school here). She keeps asking me too stay and that she misses me. I really like her and I'm willing to stay for her.

Everything was good and well untill 3 weeks ago when she told me she feels guilty about all of it because of her parents. She told me she still wants to hang out but only be friends untill she's allowed (next year). I was dissapointed, but I accepted and we moved on as she asked me too.

But my other problem since 3 weeks ago is that she doesnt really talk to me anymore when we're alone, only when we're with friends and she doesnt want to hang out together anymore either (she keeps telling me stuff that she feels sick, which i think she makes up). Even though whenever we talk on msn she keeps on asking me to stay next year and that she really cares about me.

Now I want to know what other people would do, stay here and believe she actually means it (or stay and see my life ruined by not being able to leave) or should I just forget and move on?

[devonbrown]

Staying for a relationship that you are not sure is going to advance any further does not make a lot of sense. You have to be true to yourself and pursue your goals in life. If she wants to be in your life, the distance will just be another obstacle to overcome. You can still talk on the phone, see each other on holiday, Skype, text, etc.
If she is keeping you at arm's length though, it could be because she is gearing herself up for the worst. It is a normal defense mechanism.
But don't hold your life back for anyone. You will just wind up resenting her in the long run, even if things do work out.