Where to go from here?

[el3na]

I really need some advice!!

When my ex-boyfriend broke up with me over a year ago, I found myself totally heartbroken and I made all of the typical mistakes. I always wanted him back but after lots of time had past and also lots of rejection, I pretty much got over the idea. I had removed him from my life and gotten over the past when he approached me and wanted to reconcile. We got very close very quickly, he would text me if we hadn't spoken for a few days, he was very protective and often wanted me to stay over. All of that's died down now and as we went through all that without getting back together, we've slipped into this awkward friend stage and it's brought back all of my past hurt and I feel weak again. I think that a part of him does still care about me and I really want to have another go at the relationship. Does anyone have any idea what I should do from this point to get it back? Should I cut off contact for a while? It's a bit different to wanting to reconcile a relationship instantly after a break-up because our break-up was such a long time ago from now.

Sorry that I wrote so much, I'd be really grateful of any advice with this

Elena x

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Just be up front. Tell him you don't want to hang out at all anymore unless he's interested in trying the relationship again. If he's not interested, tell him that he's not to contact you at all anymore, unless he changes his mind.

[Boisdevie]

You need to stay away from him and find a new life for yourself. I assume there's nothing forcing you to see him or bump into him - so don't. Find somebody new and you'll soon forget about him. Good luck.

[warriormaiden]

You need to move on. Leave him alone, break him off physically and emotionally like you had done before. Just stop the calls, the texts, everything. You need to be healthy, and with him around, it's only going to weaken you and drag you down.

[Incognito]

Exactly. There is no point in wasting time on someone who isn't sure of what they want. Spend some time alone to get yourself together and then get back on the market. You want to avoid a rebound relationship.

[devonbrown]

Just be honest with him and have one of the "talks" with him. It might not be pretty or comfortable, but it is the only way you will be able to feel confident to either move on or get back together.

[el3na]

Thanks for all your advice, it's given me some clarity on what to do

[reeba]

So what was he doing this past year that kept him from realizing this sooner? Has he just broken up with someone or maybe some other failure and now he is looking for some comfort? Don't let him use you to fill the void and be the giver of sympathy.

Unless he left for a real good reason, I would tell him to get lost. You just started to move on, why drag yourself right back down again?

By the way, just because you clicked again means nothing. That is common with everyone when they meet up with their ex. And it just leads to make up sex, and then you finding yourself dumped again. Whatever gave him the idea to leave a year ago probabaly hasnt' changed.