i go into a bad situation. Need some support and help please.

[John May]

Let me start of telling you all that I kind of know that I am in a bad situation and need to end asap. But its late and I cant sleep because I have been crying non stop all night. And would really appreciate some support and words to get me through this.

Here is the summary of things:

I met this girl online about 2 years ago. We have never met, but we have started to talk more and more until about 1 year ago we start to talk every day for hours and mutual feelings started to develop.

She wanted some time to "get to know me" because she claimed she was scared to meet. I agreed and gave her some space. But she could never give me a specific date on when she wanted to meet.

We agreed to be exclusive to each other, because we decided that we were both in love.( I know it sounds stupid, to be in love with someone you never met, but it is true. I love the person who I talked on the phone every day.)

During the middle of the year, I found out that she was also talking to someone else, in a sexual manner. But also had never met the guy. It devastated me. I was heart broken.
She said she was embarrassed and sorry and that she would do anything to make amends that she did not want to loose me.


I agreed to give her another chance with the condition that I needed to meet her before years end.

She said she would come to see me in December. ( We live in different States)

Then she said she would come on Xmas day.

Today she gave me some BS that she would not be able to come at all. Something about she asked her Aunt to buy her ticket, and she didnt. blah blah blah.

Anyway. I care for her, I love her with all my heart ( I know it sounds stupid, but I do) and she says she does too. But I just think this is evil and she is treating me like shit.

I know I have to get out of it. I know it is damaging and a unhealthy situation.

But deep inside my heart I just want it to work out, and It drives me crazy to think of her with some other guy.

Not to be cocky or anything. But I am a good looking guy, I am a successful young doctor, and I really generous, genuine person.

I dont think I should be going through this. But I dont know how to get out.

Please... Any word of support or help I would greatly appreciate.

Thank you

[VincenzoG91]

She is probably spending Christmas with the other guy, but this is actually a good thing for you. You could have continued on in this lousy sham of an online relationship for another two years, depriving yourself of the warmth and comfort of a real relationship with a woman that you could actually touch. But you ducked a bullet here. Wherever you live, I'm sure there are women who would be interested in meeting a sensitive and caring guy like yourself. You just need to get out there and meet them. Or if you're shy, you can meet local women through online dating, but you must stay focused on your immediate geographic area and avoid another painful and empty long distance relationship.

Spend the rest of this month getting yourself back together. Talk to friends and family. Go see a funny movie. Pick up a new hobby. Whatever, just stay busy for a while. Then go to the biggest New Years Eve party that you can find, and have fun. After the start of the new year is a prime time to be dating, because there are a lot of women who are facing the prospect of being alone on Valentine's Day, so they will be trying to meet guys in January and early February. Good luck.