Did I sleep with him too soon?

[smackie9]

If things don't feel right, then they are not. I was in your situation many years ago. It didn't feel like what a relationship should be so I broke up with him. He didn't seem to be too heart broken about it so that was enough proof for me.

[sookie6]

If things don't feel right, then they are not.

Yes excellent advice I've experienced too!

[Lisa89]

Thats not necessarily true. I slept with someone on the first night (only wanted sex, wasnt looking for a relationship) and we went on to be together for the best part of a year. Im not reccommending always sleeping with someone on the first night, but its not always true that if you do, that's all you get.

But with that said, I agree with most of the guys on here... whenever a guy tells me how much he likes me... thinks im beatiful etc I always assume they just want sex then if it happens, it happens on my terms because I know whats going on.

Do what sookie6 said, tell him where you are in this- if he wants you like he says he does, hell tell you- he might want to take it slow, but hell tell you. If he doesnt, its a lesson learnt and hopefully you would have picked up a few tricks you can use on guys!

[China]

Well he continues to call/text but I've cooled on him. I let him initiate everything and just respond. Personally I like him but I'm not even sure how to have the conversation with him.

[SelflessnHumble]

I let him initiate everything and just respond. Personally I like him but I'm not even sure how to have the conversation with him.

So you basically just switched the dynamic from mutually contacting each other to just letting him do all the work?
If he picks up the slack based on your deficit/lack of communicating him, isn't it still the same thing?
In this scenario 50/50=70/30, 80/20 or even 90/10 because the end result is the same.

Of course he continues to call and text.
When a guy has an easy way of getting something (booty) he will make the call.

[China]

True except that there's no initiation of a booty call. Just calls and texts.

[Epic]

I say back off for a bit and dont answer his calls until he drives down to see you. Try laying off the sex and see how long it takes for him to make a move.

[China]

He texted me earlier to say that he misses me. I didn't respond. We'll see what happens tomorrow.

[SelflessnHumble]

A booty call can only be initiated if there is physical contact.
Hence why he said he misses you.

It could be that he really is too busy but then again...
Is this the best kind of relationship circumstance you like to be in? (distant but texting a lot?)
If so, then go for it. BUT I guarantee you if you don't have sex with him: you just might discover something new about him.

[China]

He travels a lot for work which I knew when I met him. My plan is not to have him over for awhile....we'll see.

[xxazurexx]

would guys really keep in touch that much if it was a booty call?

Course they would and if they want to ensure the supply of easy sex, as and when it suits them.

In future beware of men online who come on strong and after only knowing you 2 seconds. They have to promise you this, that and the other and tell you what they think you wanna hear and to get the sex. Once they get the sex, mission accomplished.....what is there to work for anymore?

Men also keep women around and hanging on, because men talk and act like they want a relationship.....but it's a relationship that doesn't happen and never gets off the ground. He's using a woman and for his own selfish purposes in that situation....ie: sex on tap.

Please don't be so gullible in future. If you are smart, you can easily learn to weed out the losers and players.

If you are looking for serious with a guy, you give him reason to take you seriously and that doesn't include sleeping with him off the bat.

[xxazurexx]

True except that there's no initiation of a booty call. Just calls and texts.

That is called keeping you sweet, till he wants another booty call.

[Raze]

would guys really keep in touch that much if it was a booty call?

It depends if you're stupid enough to be a bootycall again. If you've ever watched "40 Year Old Virgin", it's called a "spank bank" as in my spank bank has been filled.

[Paul Cho]

The art of keeping a girl around to screw when needed.


This is something I shamelessly do all the time. I have my good girl, the one I adore, but sometimes, you need to have something else on the side, the backup plan. I always have time for my good girl, but when there are those days when she does not want to put out, and you need to relieve some stress or just a good old fashioned blow out, you need to use the backup plan.

Now the backup plan will only work if you keep them close, not too close, but close enough. I have 3 different cell phones, my real phone and the 2 I use for the backup plan girls. I always try to keep in touch with my backup plan, just to string them along. Text them, say nice things, make them feel sexy, buy them things when I have to- to keep them sedated.

Reading this story from the OP, I feel its a backup plan.



Paul Cho

[Lisa89]

I have 3 different cell phones, my real phone and the 2 I use for the backup plan girls. I always try to keep in touch with my backup plan, just to string them along. Text them, say nice things, make them feel sexy, buy them things when I have to- to keep them sedated.

Girls, dont you feel so much better about relationships knowing theres guys like this out there...