What to do with him?

[Akilah]

Hi

I'm 26 and I have been in a 4 yr relationship with Joe . It will be 5 years in July 21st 2011.

Well Im engaged now since May 21st 2010, and my fiance and I suppose to get married march 26th 2011.
However, as of last week he said he needed space . He said he is on his personal journey and doesnt want to tell me whats truly wrong with him.

I feel hurt and I wonder if my relationship is at its end. I dont know if to break things off , such as the engagement, cause it breaks my heart that my fiance cannot confide in me, or solve problems together. How can a marriage work if we dont communicate our problems or feelings to each other?

He said he feels like a failure, he dont know if he can fulfil the husband role. The wedding was orginally Jan 29th but HE pushed it to March 26th so we could have more time preparing, now he wants to push it back again (he hasnt confirmed this, but I KNOW ) ,he says that he loves me and wants to marry me.

I just dont know what to do about him. He has left me feeling uncertain about our relationship and future marriage, It hurts because I love him so. The plans for wedding is at a standstil

[MerryH]

Yeah, he should be able to confide in you at this point. If I were in your position, I would sit him down one last time and tell him basically what you posted here:

How can a marriage work if we dont communicate our problems or feelings to each other?

And just let him know that you're obviously feeling uncertain and if he can't talk to you about problems then the marriage probably won't work out. Tell him it's unfair to keep stringing you along and leaving you in the dark about this.

Though if you've already tried getting him to open up by pointing out the fairness and logic in your argument and he still can't provide you with the truth then you should end it for good. He's obviously not ready to be a good life partner and gives no shits about being decent to you. Therefore, he does not respect you.