girl cheated on her bf with me

[sull43]

I already posted this but i want a womans thoughts on what is going through this girl's head


So this past new years eve I was invited by a girl I went to school with since 2nd grade to go out to a club in the city. We were never really friends back then, more like just two kids who went to a very small catholic school. We graduated 8th grade and went our seperate ways. About 2 summers ago, I re-established contact with her through another friend we used to go to school with (they went to the same high school and are good friends).. We went to the beach one or two times as a group and I really didnt have any feelings for her. I am 20 now and a junior in college. I got her number a few months ago and we exchanged very few messages. I hung out with her a few times with our mutual friends and she is a great person to be with, I get very nervous around girls because i am shy but i have to say i feel very relaxed around her and enjoy her company. I know she thinks i am cute because my friend told me this. she is kind of a nerdy punk snowboarder girl fun to be around doesnt complain alot and i feel really comfortable around her

So here is my problem. She has had a boyfriend for a while, maybe a year or less Im not sure. He lives far away and they know each other from college. i think hes a tool because he wears emo clothes and white v neck tees that are too small. Her girlfriend and BF were going to the club with us and another guy we are friends with. when she invited me via text i was unsure if i wanted to go. she persisted that she would be the third wheel and i should come"be a bad dancer with me".i was at work and busy and made it seem a bit reluctant to go but finally agreed.

So I show up at her house to pregame before we took the train in and she looks prettier than Ive ever seen her before. we all drank alot and went to the club. We were having a good time dancing to the electro club music and started hooking up on the dance floor. she said dont say anything but it was a good long kiss. Her friend saw and when we were walking out of the club and was callin her a cheater kind of playfully and didnt really have much of a reaction that i could gauge. she wore my sweatshirt from the time we left the club until she went to bed. in my drunken stupor i slept on her bed because she said someone could sleep in her bed and on the couches.. thought about trying something but her bf was texting her and calling about something and i felt guilty because i told myself not to try anything because i knew i would and decided it was best not to do anything because we were so drunk.

we went snowboarding yesterday. i texted her today saying thanks for inviting me out and to thank her parents for their hospitality. she replied letting me know she is having a party near my town in a week


What is going on in this girl's mind? does she like me? is she unhappy with her current bf?

[xxazurexx]

It takes a cheater, to know a cheater. To know how a cheater operates and thinks, we have to have been cheaters ourselves......and I've never been a cheater, therefore it is impossible for me to know just what exactly goes through a cheaters head or the mindset.

One thing I can say is, if she will cheat on one guy, she would easily cheat on you also. So don't assume you are 'special' or 'different' in any way, because you aint and wont be.

[vashti]

I don't think she has cheated... yet. But she will, if she continues along this path, Why don't you ask her what her game is?

[sull43]

Im not sure how I should go about doing that.

[vashti]

You simply ask "so what's the story with you and your boyfriend? Are you breaking up, or what?"

[sull43]

For some reason I dont think asking her "are you breaking up or what" is a good thing to do after what has transpired.. I think she is going to try and keep it a secret from him and everyone else for that matter

[Raze]

It takes a cheater, to know a cheater. To know how a cheater operates and thinks, we have to have been cheaters ourselves......and I've never been a cheater, therefore it is impossible for me to know just what exactly goes through a cheaters head or the mindset.

One thing I can say is, if she will cheat on one guy, she would easily cheat on you also. So don't assume you are 'special' or 'different' in any way, because you aint and wont be.

I agree 100%. She will just cheat on you. People who cheat will always cheat.

[Petit Papillon]

Well you could help her not to become a cheater. You can break the contact now before you start to really feel something towards her or to talk to her and tell her that you don't like to be the second guy and before she will do anything with youo,she has to choose you or him . She clearly wants something from you but don't let her do that.

[shadowMike4d4]

Confront her.

Say you feel guilty for what's going on and ask what her intent is, ask her to her face. Say "Hey, look I need to know...what are your intentions with me? I don't want to make you a cheater, and I don't want to just be someone to fall back on. So I want to know how you feel...if you want me, you're going to have to leave your boyfriend. If you don't, then we can't do anything more than we already have."