why does she contact her x?

[tom84]

Ok so just a quick question for the girls. First off, don't turn this into a 'snooping' question and yelling at me for doing so...

So I looked at my wifes phone, and we have smartphones, so you can just click the facebook app. Well I noticed in her facebook messages she iniated a chat with a guy she slept with before me. She just got to college, and in the first week she slept with this guy. They lasted only about 3 days, and if I remember it didn't end very well, he was controlling and didn't want to let her leave his room, she ran out, and it was over. Anyways, months later me and her started going out, and she pretty much stopped contact with this person, she was only in contact with him for about 1 month total of her life...

Ok, so now, 7 years later, she facebook messages him and just says hi to begin with. They have a short conversation(like 20messages back and forth), and nothing that was bad at all, just pretty much asking what they've been up to.

My question is. what is she thinking/why would she care to or want to contact this random guy she knew for only a month but slept with. why contact that person when she is now happily married. what is the point of that, why would she contact him?

[violingirl]

Curiosity. I've stayed in touch with a few of my 'exs' just so I'd know what they're up to. I'm not buddies with them, but I'd consider them to be acquaintences. I don't talk to them regularly, but if they cross my mind, I say hello.

[xxazurexx]

God knows. But I wouldn't be curious or interested in some guy from my past who I'd known only 3 days. He's someone I'd probably long forgotten about.

People are different though. I think she sounds bored, in that she'd want to contact him.

[ammi00]

Are you sure things weren't more complicated than that and that their "relationship" didn't last more than 3 days? Like xxaazurexx said, it's pretty strange that she contacted someone who was part of her life only for 3 days... It's good they haven't talked about anything odd, but on the other side she sounds a bit curious or interested about this guy.

[Beautiful]

I agree with ammi00, it probably was more than 3 days thing. She did not tell you the whole story, so you do not have to worry. I personally do not remember the guys whom I was seeing for so short and some time ago. But there is nothing to worry about. She is just curious and wants to find out where that guy is and what he is up to. However, I think it is not nice towards you, and you have the whole right to ask her why she is doing it.

[HeartIsAching]

Ok so just a quick question for the girls. First off, don't turn this into a 'snooping' question and yelling at me for doing so...

{snip}

My question is. what is she thinking/why would she care to or want to contact this random guy she knew for only a month but slept with. why contact that person when she is now happily married. what is the point of that, why would she contact him?

Why not? You WERE wrong to look in her phone. Period. It's reprehensible.

And how do you know she's "happily married"? Maybe she's not happy. Maybe you should communicate with YOUR WIFE about this instead of us. Ask her. Confess your controlling behavior and invasion of her privacy, and thrash this out.