How To Bring This Up Delicately

[violingirl]

I've been with my lover for over a year now. He and I both have spouses. We talk every day and see each other every few months to hang out and have some fun. We've always used condoms, but I'd like to change that the next time we're together. We're both clean...no germs. How do I approach this with him?

[HeartIsAching]

You don't. If you're fooling around, going without a condom is putting OTHER PEOPLE'S lives at risk without telling them. That's just wrong.

[sweetkissesforu]

Once a cheat always a cheat
not only when you do that you put his wife at risk of a std too
how do you know he is clean every few months you see him for sex
you are not a very smart woman are you
not only are you sleeping with him but everyone his wife slept with and vice versa
price you pay for having a fling every so often

[girl68]

Second that. You don't. Unprotected sex should be reserved for MONOGOMOUS couples.

[VincenzoG91]

I've been with my lover for over a year now. He and I both have spouses. We talk every day and see each other every few months to hang out and have some fun. We've always used condoms, but I'd like to change that the next time we're together. We're both clean...no germs. How do I approach this with him?

You already know for a fact that your lover is a cheater. How do you know that he isn't also doing someone else?

[xxazurexx]

He's probably shagging a few women behind his wifes back....and he doesn't want to give his wife an STD. To pass on an STD would make her aware of what he is up too....and like most married men he doesn't want her knowing and because he will be afraid to lose her.

If he isn't shagging a few more women and just you, then he obviously doesn't trust that you 'clean' enough and so as not to pass anything on to his wife.

Come to think of it, I don't blame him for wearing one. I mean if you will shag married men and behind your hubbys back, he totally lacks respect for you and probably thinks you are shagging a few more besides him.

All you are is another 'hole'....he will tire of banging eventually.

[sweetkissesforu]

He's probably shagging a few women behind his wifes back....and he doesn't want to give his wife an STD. To pass on an STD would make her aware of what he is up too....and like most married men he doesn't want her knowing and because he will be afraid to lose her.

If he isn't shagging a few more women and just you, then he obviously doesn't trust that you 'clean' enough and so as not to pass anything on to his wife.

Come to think of it, I don't blame him for wearing one. I mean if you will shag married men and behind your hubbys back, he totally lacks respect for you and probably thinks you are shagging a few more besides him.

All you are is another 'hole'....he will tire of banging eventually.

One more quick point is she old enough to still have children does he want that to i also think cheats are assos bottom line sorry for being so blunt it makes me mad marriage is sacred i would never forgive my man doing this as i read so many posts on this site wow

[courtney90]

Wow ...seriously! How could you do this in the first place? I don't get cheaters! You are a married woman...why did you even get married?? I hope both of your spouses find out about this and end up with eachother!

[violingirl]

is she old enough to still have children

Yes, I'm able to have children, but he's had a vasectomy. You can bash the cheating all you want guys, but it really didn't help to answer the question I asked.

[girl68]

several of us have addressed your EXACT question.

[sweetkissesforu]

Yes, I'm able to have children, but he's had a vasectomy. You can bash the cheating all you want guys, but it really didn't help to answer the question I asked.

you asked our opinions and most have been biased so in that none of us think that cheating is exceptable
try coming right up front i want you to have sex without a condom he is your cheating lover
taking a risk of ruining 2 families be honest and say it
and pray that he dont have anything you dont want like an std

[Fabulous]

Guys guys, you assume condoms protect from STDs. They protect you from PREGNANCY. She can do that by going on birth control. Condoms help prevent STDs, but they are far less effective than you might think. Here are some condom facts:

[url=http://www.cdc.gov/condomeffectiveness/latex.htm]CDC - Condom Effectiveness - Male Latex Condoms and Sexually Transmitted Diseases[/url]

[vashti]

^ that article says they are pretty damn effective, when used properly.

Violin girl - you only see him every few months. That's not much. I would guess he has other lovers when he's not seeing you. You would be foolish to forego protection.

[hello1]

Its not worth the risk

[smackie9]

If this guy is screwing you behind his wife's back, who's to say he's not screwin someone else behind both your backs. When it comes to affairs you are not the one that gets the respect or the promise of fidelity. There are no rules when playin dirty.

If your husband was having an affair without protection and F ucks you......how would you feel about that? I'm sure you never bother to because you are only thinking about yourself. I can see why there are issues in your marriage and it's no fault of your husband.