Did I overreact?

**Sousou** · 12-04-11, 06:16 AM

No, absolutely not, I've spoken to him about this for 6 months, explaining, letting him know how I felt, etc etc etc, for 6 months (!) - her pic was the last straw. Generally I do tend to bottle things up - but in her case, he knew how I felt about what was going on, and he knew that I had cut off with her 3 months prior because I felt disrespected by her actions. Anymore talking about this to him and I would've driven myself up the walls!

You are right, I should have been pissed at him, but I was pissed at her too due to the lingerie shopping trip (I'm sure he wasn't the one buying - it was her buying for her bf), the lying to my face (at least he didn't lie to me when he went to see her), and the disrespect (she was like a sister to me, and I never expected this from her). He passively encouraged her to continue disrespecting me and she actively did the same too (asking him to drive her places, run her errands, etc).

You can not defend her - she lied to my face and disrespected our friendship. Yet, in all fairness they were both as bad as each other. Hence, they have both been trimmed.

**girl68** · 12-04-11, 06:32 AM

In that case, you let him walk all over you.

**Sousou** · 12-04-11, 06:35 AM

Yep - I did.

Past tense :o)

**DarkHelmet82** · 12-04-11, 06:42 AM

good to hear!

**Sousou** · 12-04-11, 07:04 AM

No, really - thank you everyone you've all been SO helpful!

Really appreciate all your feedback :o)

**bloodtippedrose** · 12-04-11, 07:18 AM

It seems like you've been telling yourself this is what needs to happen for a while now and was just looking for confirmation. I hope you have little trouble moving on from him and I definitely hope you don't let yourself get lured back! Remember this day, that you've gotten so frustrated with his actions that you had to post about them to strangers, and use it (as a mental stonghold) if you ever feel like he didn't deserve you leaving him.

**Sousou** · 12-04-11, 10:25 PM

Thanks Bloodtippedrose - well, yes this whole 'mutual' friend stress has been going on for 6 months - the pic was the last straw pretty much. I allowed a lot of things over the years - but continuous disrespect, I wasn't going to tolerate anymore.

I don't think there will be any luring - he's made his bed, so they say. It isn't easy moving on though, one minute I'm questioning my actions (hence this post, did I overreact?) and the next minute - as you say - I'm posting to strangers to use as mental stronghold!

It's been 7 years, I appreciate that it won't be easy...

**acloy** · 12-04-11, 11:10 PM

hmm... not to say you are over-reacted... I know you feel a sense of being cheated, that's why you reacted that way.. I understand this

**Sousou** · 12-04-11, 11:22 PM

Thanks acloy!

**DarkHelmet82** · 13-04-11, 02:45 AM

sousou.. STOP THINKING ABOUT IT!!!!

**Sousou** · 13-04-11, 02:55 AM

Lol - I try I try!

**DarkHelmet82** · 13-04-11, 03:42 AM

No try just do. As Yoda would say.... seriously buy "the four agreements" it will help you.

**Sousou** · 13-04-11, 04:07 AM

I was reading this other thread where you recommended it - funnily, this is the only book that my ex has ever read (he doesn't like reading *rolls eyes*).

I'm checking it out on Amazon as we speak