Just playing with my head!?

[lledfor4]

I met this guy, we'll call him Jay, last Saturday. My best girlfriend set me up with him. In the text messages and emails prior to meeting, I asked him what he was looking for: hooking up, dating, relationship, etc. He said he was pretty much up for anything.
The first night we met, we were at a party, drinking a little, but even before intoxication set in there was DEFINITELY a connection.. We ended up kissing at the end of the night, and there was a real spark. As I went home, we texted the whole way, him saying how much of a connection he truly felt with me, and how badly he wanted to see me again.
The next night I ended up in the hospital, taking care of my mother. We found out she had a tumor in her abdomen. He and I were texting the whole time.. he was being extremely supportive. So supportive, that the next day after he got off work, he came up and visited me at the hospital. Stayed there for a few hours, until he had to leave for plans he had already made with friends. But he texted me the whole time telling me how amazing I was, and that he was beginning to fall for me. This did NOT bother me because I was feeling the same way. We had an amazing connection like I've never felt before with anyone.
We spent a few more evenings together, allowing me to meet his friends, and learn to connect with them. We always had an amazing time. The following Thursday he took me on a nice date... then bowling. I know I had stars in my eyes at this point. When he brought me back to my car at the end of the evening, we sat in his truck, holding hands, kissing, and talking about how much we liked each other. He could tell I was holding something back, and he kept prodding me to say it. I told him "No, its too much.." but then he was like "You never know, I could be feeling the exact same way..." there was a pause, he took my face in his hands, looked me dead in the eyes, and said "I'm falling in love with you..." At which point I said "I love you" and kissed him...... he texted me later telling me he meant every word he had said......
Now my best girlfriend at this point confronted me the next day, saying we needed to slow down we were going way too fast. I kinda let it go in one ear and out the other.... because Jay was the one who had started all this love talk in the first place. I felt ok to let myself fall. Saturday was another party... and OF COURSE we were having a wonderful time. We ended up sleeping together that night and it was AMAZING! I walked outside afterwards to get something out of my car and accidentally overheard him telling one of his guyfriends I was "the best he ever had." I felt good...
Next day, he kept telling me how amazing the night before was, how it was the best night he ever had. That night however, he got distant... and my best friend kept nagging about us slowing down... not to let myself fall.. which is the total opposite of what I thought was happening....
So I texted him that night asking "Do you think we are moving too fast, because if for any reason you feel like were running before we learn to crawl, I really need to know.." He responded, "Yes I do feel we are moving too fast. I'm not looking for anything that serious right now.."
WHAT!? That contradicted everything he had been saying and making me believe all week.... At this point, I agreed that we could slow down....
And now, he still texts me every morning, but usually stops when he gets around his friends. And even if he says he'll text me, about 75% of the time, he doesn't... I have deleted his number several times, trying not to blow up his phone, or even text him if he doesn't text me first. I haven't seen him since Saturday night... and he hasn't acted or questioned as if he wants to see me until today when he said we might see each other this weekend... and he did say the other day he did miss me...
Is he into me AT ALL?! I'm fine with it just being a casual thing, but did he even mean a word he said last week? Should I ask him about it?? I am so confused!

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Back way off and let him contact you. During this time apart, figure out exactly what you want, and if he does call you back be ready to break it down to him and let him decide how he wants to proceed. Go out and talk to other guys to distract yourself in the meantime.

[ShellyZ]

Sounds like a typical player to me. It's not a coincidence that he wanted to slow down right after you had sex with him. Before sex, he was falling in love with you, wanted to see you and talk to you all the time, etc. After sex, he's not looking for anything serious and he wants to slow down. I can almost guarantee that if you had asked him BEFORE you had sex if you were going too fast, he would have said no, of course not, he's falling in love with you, he's never felt this way about anyone before, blah, blah, blah.

Also, it's not a good sign that right after you had sex, he was already telling all his friends about it. He was bragging, not caring whether or not you wanted the whole world to know about your private sex life.

[listen not hear]

He could be just trying to get you into bed with you as fast as he could. Doing it this way, like you're falling quickly IS the fastest way but guys who do this also think this makes women clingy so they distance themselves ASAP. Though most still want to keep in touch so they can get with you when he feels like it and because you already did it once he thinks you'll be more open to giving in now. These guys are jerks, he may or may not be one.

He also could be impulsive. Watch out for these guys too, unless you like a bipolar relationship. He could be one of those guys who DO fall quickly but only because he likes the way it feels to fall or have someone to fall for him...till they realize "Aw, I'm doing it again. I better back off" and he starts questioning everything and feels dumb for going to quickly in the first place and tries to counteract it by trying to see you as someone he simply doesn't know or even like in that way.

Or maybe your friend is talking to more then just you and convinced him something she couldn't do to you. He also could have found someone else he's interested in or maybe an ex came back or whatever.

The best outcome could be that he simply regrets going to quickly in the first place and doesn't want to look like a clingy loser so he's trying to prove to you he's not. The best way to find out is by backing off. if he doesn't text or call you don't even contact him for a few days. Then if a week goes by and he still hasn't gotten a old of you, text him and say, "Hey! I haven't tried contacting you for a while. I just been so busy to talk to anyway and now at the end of the week I'm looking to unwind a bit. Want to get a drink with me?" Just keep it casual and DO NOT SLEEP WITH HIM and make it known that you simply aren't ready to do that again. If he doesn't contact you after that...let him go.

[Horseyguy]

He wanted you for sex, you gave it to him and now he's gone.

Classic player move, anyone that says they love you after a couple of dates isn't serious relationship material