A little help please? confused and trying not to do anything silly!

[skinnbones]

Ok, so here goes. Pull up a seat and get comfortable because this is a long old story. Help and suggestions from people would be great!

I recently met this really cool girl who I spoke to every day for hours (from around 7 in the evening until 1 am at least every day) the first time we spoke on the phone it was literally from around 7 until 5am the next morning. Anyways, after talking so much for a week we decided we'd go out on a date on the friday after we'd finished work. (she lives around an hour from me so I drove to her place and we went to a countryside pub near her home. we didn't end up eating and i was so nervous but in the end it was ok - we just had a few drinks, went to her place and listened to some music...we spoke and had a really good night. we agreed to take things "slow" and see where it takes us. One thing that sticks in my memory is the sight of her looking up at me and saying "we've both been hurt lately lets not let it happen again" she also kept saying how much she liked me etc and i felt the same. (she's recently broken up with a partner in the last few months, and the same for me. both messy situations)

so for the next week the pattern continued we spoke a lot and had plans to meet on the weekend for a day out, which had to be canceled due to her being called in to work, which was fine. She then disapeared for a week or so, eventually getting in contact saying that she had to fly home (she's American and lives in the UK) for a family emergency. she said she wanted to tell me that she was gone and she wanted to email or skype me but didnt get the time. she also kept saying how she felt she'd messed things up, but after talking to her mum she said that "id understand if she explained whe she get home". Although i found it a bit strange her mum was right i did understand and told her not to worry she hasnt messed anything up.

This is where the confusion started, for the next week it went back to normal we spoke all the time, had a laugh and joke on the phone and spoke about things. and she often said "i wish you were here" but such as the timing, i was just getting ready to go on my holiday to America for a roadtrip and told her id be in contact while i was away. I called her while i was in LA a few days before i was due to come home and she was pleased to hear from me, told me to let her know when i was home she was looking forward to seeing photos and hearing all about the trip. Once i landed back home i instantly tried to call her and got her voicemail (didnt even ring, just right to voicemail) so i sent a message saying that i was home it would be great to hear from her. Since then i havent heard a thing from her. as well as being confused at what the hell is going on, im also worried about her and if something has happened. my initial thoughts were to just give her some space and she will call when she's ready but im not sure she will.

I had a date night planned for her once i got back, which was going to be a complete surprise i was going to knock on her door and do the following:

a bunch of red roses (her favourite colour) her favourite wine is an american one she cant get here, so i got a bottle of wine and stuck a new label on it with "Almost, but note quite..." and the alice white logo. then the desription below has been replaced with "A sweet taste that’s guaranteed to make you smile" and in small print "Just mix with lemonade and no ice, unlike a certain bar maid/guy ordering it in a pub whilst being very nervous!)" refering to something that happened when we went out. i also got a bottle of lemonade with "mix with this" written on it and also she loves starbucks coffee and makes it at home use a coffee maker so i got her a pack of coffee with "and this is for the hangover" written on it. i also had a live dvd from her favourite band as she is a big music fan and the gift i got her while i was away.

so my ultimate question is, do i leave her and move on or, do i try knocking at her door? although taking all that stuff wouldnt be a good idea, perhaps walking up to her front door with some red roses wouldnt go down too badly? i really dont understand whats gone on and what has changed so much in the week i was away, or infact the 3 days between talking to her and landing back in the UK.

thoughts would be appreciated...serious answers though please people.

[smackie9]

Let her contact you. Showing up at her door is a bit pushy and it could turn out badly. If you don't hear from her, then move on. The timing is just bad and she just isn't ready to move on yet.

[elleda]

desperate. excessive.