What are the rules of 30s dating?

[mammadon]

I know that rules for dating don't exist, but in the 30s, what are the guidelines in dating?

[HeartIsAching]

Rules:

1. No cucumbers on the first date.

2. Hand lotion either.

3. No texting.

4. No changing your Facebook profile to say "In a Relationship".

5. No Tweeting at all.

6. Superglue is totally against the rules.

...that's all I've got for now. More later, I'm sure.

[smackie9]

Since everyone has different priorities in their thirties than being in their twenties, some are not looking for marriage, some are looking to have kids NOW because the clock is ticking, some are looking for a father for their kids, or need financial support for their kids, etc. There is no screwing around with expectations at this age, you have to lay it all out what you are specifically looking for.

[aprilrose4]

Good question that I'd like the answer to as well. I am starting over at 33 and this whole dating/exposing my heart to someone else is scary. I was told that there are no games anymore, people are straightforward in what they need and want. And in that respect, do realtionships move faster in your 30's because we know what we want and go after it?

[abn25]

I am 33 too and just started dating again, its a scary world out there and i completely agree about being straight forward and KNOWING what you want. IF its just sex, then deal with that, if its a realtionship, give it time to grow and communicate openly. That is the best advice i can give...

[smackie9]

Good question that I'd like the answer to as well. I am starting over at 33 and this whole dating/exposing my heart to someone else is scary. I was told that there are no games anymore, people are straightforward in what they need and want. And in that respect, do realtionships move faster in your 30's because we know what we want and go after it?

It all depends on the person. If they just got out of a marriage they might be a bit scared to commit again so soon.

[bluesummer]

I think in your 30's you're expected not to play head games anymore. Just lay it out on the table what you like and don't, and be yourself. Thirty-somethings no longer have time to date someone 10 times to figure out if the other person is compatible. I'm married now, but if I was dating again I could tell you I can now size up a potential partner in one conversation. By my late twenties I think I was going out on one or two dates and pulling the plug as soon as I realized we didn't jive. Waste of time.

And yes, I do think relationships go faster when you're older. Once you know it works, you just get on with it.

[Boisdevie]

There are two rules:
1. There are no rules because very situation is unique.
2. Read rule number one.

[Sixpacj]

Since everyone has different priorities in their thirties than being in their twenties, some are not looking for marriage, some are looking to have kids NOW because the clock is ticking, some are looking for a father for their kids, or need financial support for their kids, etc. There is no screwing around with expectations at this age, you have to lay it all out what you are specifically looking for.

I love how what you have written here is all about finding a sperm donor/provider for your offspring.. There is somethign beautiful about this kind of brutal honesty hahahaha :-) no more bullshit ;-)

[devonbrown]

I think it boils down to maturity. Those in their 30s are expecting some maturity from their dating partners and are hopefully providing the same. The time for games is over. It is time to be honest, considerate, and real. It isn't quite "put up or shut up" time, but it is approaching.