is she just confused? I am too :(

[DarkHelmet82]

Ive posted this in other sections but I usually only get answers from men.. please only respond if you are female, as I need their point of view.. thank you.

TO summarize, otherwise it will be a realy long post...

pretty much my ex broke up with me NOT because she didnt have feelings for me, but because her ex and things that happened with him keep creeping up and she swept the issues under a rug and now the rug is being lifted. Her and I dated about two weeks after they broke up (they were together 7 months and were engaged.) She said "i just need time to be single and get my head straight" I asked her if she meant she just doesnt want to date me.. she said.. "no,i dont want to date anyone." She was adamant about NOT wanting to get back with her ex as well.. She also hinted that when shes ready if I am still single we could get back together. I know I need to move on, but is it wrong to hang onto this, because I really felt something strong about her. Is space my best course of action here? She wound up contacting me the next day looking for a tanktop (which i personally dont think i had ever seen.) She also hadnt been at my place in a week.. so why look for it now? Was she just opening up dialog asking about a 12 dollar shirt? I responded a day later.

ANother thing, she would constantly tell me how much she liked being with me etc, and how much her parents loved me and how that is important to her etc...

So i guess my question is.. on Saturday she graduates with her Masters, and I was supposed to go. I was going to wait until monday and just send her a text and say "congratulations on your graduation." Is this too soon to contact her? I know she needs space, and dont want to smother her. Thank you for reading this and for the help

I am just REALLY confused.

[smackie9]

You were just a rebound guy.

[DarkHelmet82]

you think so huh? so i have no shot? And what makes you think i was a rebound... because she dated me right after him? her issues arent because shes hung up on HIM, but rather his kid whom she was pretty much the sole caregiver for. Although she did mention "I was engaged.. yeah not for that long but I still was."

[Cinnabella]

Darkhelmet, smackie was not wrong, I told you that she realised that due didn't feel strong enough fir you, trust me. No matter whatever problems with her ex I don't know, but she's still in love with him and she's trying to back off. It doesn't different than my case that I raised before, I was like woke up from a dream n realised I didn't love my 2nd bf at all, more of friends feelings but got it wrong. If she felt strong for you she Can't do that even. She will be missing you like crazy after a few days max.

[DarkHelmet82]

yeah you are probably right... i just dont know why she would lead me on then.. you dont think that people can have strong feelings for someone but the timing is just not right?

[Cinnabella]

No, you must wake up or you will feel hurt more later, coz I know if a girl acts that way, she's not so much into you. The timing is using for the other cases not much about rebounds. It's too short relationship (1,5 months), try and move on, won't take long. She leads you on coz she doesn't want to lose connection with you, If she wants to be with you, she made it!!! She's single and no barriers, her barrier is her ex- she still love. Be Strong X.

[DarkHelmet82]

she doesnt love him.. she loves HIS KID.... thats the problem.

[Cinnabella]

:-), should she tell you that she still love him after broke up with you? I feel that's just nonsense reasons. Don't you realise?

[Cinnabella]

Take it this way, I won't leave the bf I love coz I love my exes kids. Not related to each other! So she loves his kids more than you? Don't be blind.

[DarkHelmet82]

lol.. i guess i dont realize it... she did say she didnt want to get back with him.. but i guess that doesn't mean she doesn't still love him.

[Cinnabella]

Who knows if she wants to get back or not...

[DarkHelmet82]

I do.. i dont want to go into details.. but she knows hes no good for her... like I said shes more hung up on the kid, but like you said Im sure she loves him but knows hes bad news...

If she wants to be with me let her make that decision

[Cinnabella]

Yea back off n Whatever yours will be yours, if not, it never was. What I meant was, if he was that bad, she didn't hung up on him for long.... There are some facts that ppl talk bad about their ex, but it can be for hiding some feelings deep inside.

[DarkHelmet82]

he had gay porn on his computer, lied about being married, lied about doing drugs, the list goes on.. she didnt trust him and questioned his sexuality...

[smackie9]

he had gay porn on his computer, lied about being married, lied about doing drugs, the list goes on.. she didnt trust him and questioned his sexuality...

Wow! ..........