Betrayed by ex

[abn25]

I feel totally betrayed by my ex. We hadnt seen each other in 13 years and the past few months we had been texting, saw each other a few times. I was hesitant to have sex with him but the attraction was still there. It seems like after that he still called but when i brought up the fact i dont usually just sleep with someone without being in a relationship he said he didnt want one. That was fine i guess but being with him has brought up alot of feelings that i dont know how to deal with now. I know he is seeing other women or should i say girls, but he keeps contacting me on a semi regualr basis. I just recently took him to the airport and he had me make a stop for him. It was to pick up his iphone he left at some girls house. I just cant believe how humiliated and disgusted i feel now. I dont know what to say to him when i pick him up because he hasnt said anything about how he feels about me or even that he ever thought about me over the years. I am very sad and need advice as this is complicated. Thx

[BackUpOrGetStng]

If you go pick him up from the airport after that, you're just ****ing retarded and deserve every bit of humiliation and disgust and whatever negative emotions his actions conjured up inside you, and you really are as worthless as he's treating you.

[surfhb]

Yeah.....he never betrayed you. He was honest and up front and you fell for him anyway. Stop contacting him if it makes you feel bad.

[strikestwice]

He is only doing what you are allowing him to do. He hasn't betrayed you he is taking advantage of the fact that you have feelings for him. Let him know he needs to find a ride to the airport because you are busy. Go out and do something that you enjoy and work on moving on/getting over him.

[abn25]

Not quite surfer, i havent been the one doing the contacting...

[Gratedwasabi]

"Hey, this guy is using me.. how do I get him to stop?"
"Stop talking to him."
"??? Why would I do that?"

Don't be that woman.

[IncognitoSir]

Stop playing the victim and re-remove him from your life. He's not deceiving you or tricking you. Of course he contacts you, sex, no strings attached......that's what he wants and you give it to him. He's been very upfront with you, he does not want a relationship with you. Go find a guy who wants a relationship.

[zyingyang]

He's still doing the contacting b/c he knows you'll give in (b/c it shows you've been giving in) - be strong and don't answer his calls. If he doesn't want a relationship w/ you now, he's not going to want one later.
I think you need to read "he's just not that into you"

[VincenzoG91]

You two broke up 13 years ago and this guy is still causing you grief? That's on you, you're letting this happen. It doesn't matter if he is contacting you or you are contacting him, you're allowing this contact, and it's hurting you. Just stop. Cut him out of your life completely and move on.

[smackie9]

Um are you blind? Why were you even talking to this guy in the first place? You know all he wants to do is f uck. So why be associated with him. It's not his fault you have feelings for him...that all you hun. Write this idiot off. 13 years? Personally I would never have given him the time of day.

[michelle21689]

I agree, it's not betrayal but messed up. I would've stopped at a gas station, ask him to buy something like medicine because not feeling good and not being able to walk or some lame excuse... and drive away when he's in the store

[abn25]

Thats the thing, everyone is still talking about sex but he knows i wont give it now and he still keeps contacting me. i can agree withj everyone to a certain point but its complicated because of how it started. Feelings were reignited slowly, and i honestly thought he felt them too. it seems like he wouldnt be contacting me still if he didnt . i know he has issues from past relationships so i can see him not wanting one, i never really pushed it just said i dont want to be with someone(sexually) thats with someone else. Or emotionally either to be honest. But this was just a shock its like did he forget i was in the car or something?? He asked his brother if he got a text about his iphone intead??? We were extremely close when we were young and I know there is still something there so im just seeing what happens. So far though as i said...im disgusted. I will pick them up simply becasue i said i would and i keep my word. Thanks for everyones usual brutal but true opinions but until your in it, you can never know. thx again I will update the way home....

[smackie9]

I guess you are not seeing it from our end either.

[abn25]

Update: Picked him up yesterday against everybody's judgement. Things were fine, kinda quiet most of way as we were all tired. When I dropped him off he asked me out to drinks again this wknd. Friend drinks...dont know...sex drinks...probably but he knows i will have feelings for him so again dont know what to do. Dont want to lose him after its been this long. Im just starting to realize even though it sounds like he's a jerk, he has been honest with me about seeing other girls. Im just not into that so i guess im not sure how to proceed. Was thinking Id have to make something up this wknd to at least make him think differently about things or see where im coming from. Suggestions anyone?

[Gratedwasabi]

Update: Picked him up yesterday against everybody's judgement. Things were fine, kinda quiet most of way as we were all tired. When I dropped him off he asked me out to drinks again this wknd. Friend drinks...dont know...sex drinks...probably but he knows i will have feelings for him so again dont know what to do. Dont want to lose him after its been this long. Im just starting to realize even though it sounds like he's a jerk, he has been honest with me about seeing other girls. Im just not into that so i guess im not sure how to proceed. Was thinking Id have to make something up this wknd to at least make him think differently about things or see where im coming from. Suggestions anyone?

Nope. You obviously are just going to keep trying to convince him you're the one and only for him.. and keep failing.