Where do I stand, what to do

[Davie-boy]

This story goes back a couple of years. I have been very close to this girl for the past few years, but it was the old story of her being in a relationship with a friend of mine. Obviously I couldnt say anything about how I feel, but have always been there for her and we really enjoy each others company, we did kiss in this time but nothing more, I didnt make any moves. She has in the past said if she wasnt with him we'd be together, a strange thing to say mabey. As for the boyfriend, he would cheat on her reguarly, and i was often put in a awkward place by being with him on a night out when he would cheat. I couldnt tell her because I dont want to be the guy who hurts her, instead i would just let it get to me whilst she was blistfully unaware.

So recently they have come to an end, the truth is out. They still live together because she cant afford to move out at the moment. So whilst he is stringing a few girls along at the moment, she seems happy to sit and wait in hope they fall back in. So now i ask what do i do? Do I tell her how I feel? Do i stand by if she ends up with another guy? Hopefully a guy who would treat her right, but still the pain of it not being me. Or do i just walk away? Somthing I feel I may have to do if she get s back with my cheating friend, purely because i dont want to see her being hurt any more, it will be the hardest thing ive ever done though.

All advice welcome.

Dave

[bigdaddy863]

Dude just go for it cause u cant just let posibely a great thing pass you by im in a the same situation right now to but they havent broke up yet but its coming. I would go for it bro.

[mhyzkie]

End Your Own Misery ... Listen To Your Heart And Follow What It Tells You, For Your Heart Will Always Lead You To True Happiness ... Good Luck

[Capricorn2112]

She needs to know he's cheating on her!!! Then she'll leave, and you can be there for her. Take it from there.

"I couldnt tell her because I dont want to be the guy who hurts her"

By not telling her, you ARE the guy who is hurting her. Imagine the look on her face when she realizes that you knew and chose NOT to tell her. I think that right there would ruin your chances with her. It would with me at least...

Oh and she will tell your friend that she heard it from you, so he's going to be very unhappy with you... BUT what he is doing is wrong, and that poor girl needs to know what a douchebag he is. Friends like that come and go... you never know, she could turn out to be the love of your life! Or at very least, you'll help someone you care for.

[Wakeup]

Well, you're between a rock and a hard place now. If you ask her out in a romantic sense you're likely to end up in a rebound relationship with her and that never turns out well for the person who is being used as a human bandaid (that'd be you, OP). Human bandaids are great for the grieving person to help them wth the pain of the emotional injury they're suffering through due to the infidelity and the breakdown of her relationship.

The thing is, that once the person who is grieving a failed relationship starts to feel better (thanks to your attention), starts to get their confidence back, they won't feel the same about their human bandaid and then you'll get dumped or nexted for someone new.

Google "Rebound Relationship" and read all you can so that you know what I'm talking about.

You'd be better off if you got on with your life and found another girl to keep you company. This girl has a lot to process and won't be emotionally ready to be in a healthy relationship for some time. Be careful you don't become her rebound.

[IndiReloaded]

[ Imagine the look on her face when she realizes that you knew and chose NOT to tell her.

This^. Now is the time to let her know how you feel and that you really think she deserves better. Its bad enough you knew and didn't tell her but if you don't step up now she will likely never forgive you. Do remind her, tho, that you only ever wanted her to be happy. It may take time, but she will eventually realize that you aren't the one who has hurt her. Make sure she understands it was for her sake you kept quiet, not to protect your friend.

Then, step back until she gets out of the relationship with him. You can't be her lifeline on this as Wakeup says. If you do, she will never respect herself and she will end up hating you for it.

Good luck.

[Davie-boy]

thanks for all the advice. Ive told her how i feel, and got knocked back as expected. She's going back with the cheating bf. I can handle getting knocked back, its part of life really, but what i cant handle is watching her gettting hurt and messed about any more, so im walking away.

[steviej]

Wait, what happened to the code! Bro's before ho's! You snaked on your mates girl, shame on you.