+ Follow This Topic
Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Problems bewtween my girlfriend and my 2 best freinds

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    2

    Problems bewtween my girlfriend and my 2 best freinds

    Basically my girlfriend and my 2 best freinds do not get along with eachother. Its been a problem for a month or two and its gotten so bad that my girlfriend thinks that im backing them up when they get into arguements and she says it makes her feel like im teaming up with them but really i just try not to get involved with it. I hate to see them argue cause it makes me feel like im in the middle and i have to choose either them or my girlfriend. I mean, i love her and she is 7 weeks pregnent but i have only known her for 6 months where as my best friends i have known for about 7-8 years. My girlfriend hate it when my freinds ask about our business and she has a bad attitude where she will just straight up tell them to stay out our business...with an attitude and thats what my friends hate about her. Now shes basically saying were not going to be with eachother until i tell my friends that i cant be freinds with them because how they disrespected her.

    My question is, how should i approach my freinds and tell them this. These are my 2 friends that have been there for me throughout highschool and all. And know my girlfriend is saying i have to forget about them if we want to be together. I just dont know how to deal with this or make it better.
    Last edited by 04MTRX; 20-06-11 at 12:01 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    14,110
    I have a feeling that your relationship with this control freak of a girlfriend isn't going to last very long and when it's over you're going to want to have your friends for support and to help you vent and get over it all.

    So: You sit your girlfriend down nice and you tell her that you will talk to your friends about interfering in yours and her's business but you will not be giving them up completely. You tell her if she walks out on you over you keeping good friends then so be it. Then you shut up and watch her back peddal to stay and work it out.

    If she does indeed leave you then thank your lucky stars that you got out now.

    Note: Please wrap up until you get to know a girl. I suspect if she wasn't preggers you'd be gone sooner rather than later.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    I have a feeling that your relationship with this control freak of a girlfriend isn't going to last very long and when it's over you're going to want to have your friends for support and to help you vent and get over it all.

    So: You sit your girlfriend down nice and you tell her that you will talk to your friends about interfering in yours and her's business but you will not be giving them up completely. You tell her if she walks out on you over you keeping good friends then so be it. Then you shut up and watch her back peddal to stay and work it out.

    If she does indeed leave you then thank your lucky stars that you got out now.

    Note: Please wrap up until you get to know a girl. I suspect if she wasn't preggers you'd be gone sooner rather than later.
    Yes, if she was not pregnant when this happened, we would have been done. She claims they cant be good friends if they dont respect her because she is my girlfriend, i find that a little true also. One time they were arguing with eachother and i guess one of my friends called her a dumb broad kind of quietly but she heard it. And because i was there too (but i didnt hear it) she got mad at me basically saying your going to let someone say this to your girlfriend without stopping them. I think she is right to a certain point, i should have stepped in and tried to stop it from getting worse but i didnt. The only thing is that as soon as we get into an arguement and she leaves, she will text me a few hours later about how much she loves me and wants to spend the rest of her life with me. I told her her attitude gets out of hand and she says shes sorry and cant help her emotions. I want to leave her sometimes but we always come back to eachother in like a day or two. If i leave her completely, she will be so heart broken i couldnt even imagine. She just loves me so much but she can snap at me with her bad attitude. Still not sure if shes getting an abortion or not, but i told her either way ill respect your decision since i like to take responsibility for my actions too. If she doesnt get an abortion, then i want to be together with her, i dont want a child and have both parents separated.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    2,229
    Tell your friends, "Look, I can't have you disrespecting my girlfriend and calling her names. It's fine if you guys don't like her very much, but it causes problems for me when you show it. So please just cut it out and make an effort to get along with her if you see her."

    Then you tell your girlfriend, "Look, I had a talk with my friends and I don't think they are going to be a problem anymore. But I need you to know that I value my friends, and I'm not going to let you tell me who I can or can not spend time with. If you don't want to ever see them, that's fine. But if you choose to be around them, please make an effort to get along with them."

    If either party doesn't agree to that, then they don't have your best interests in mind and you can reconsider having them in your life at all.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Twin Cities
    Posts
    3,763
    You got a girl pregnant after just four months of dating? That's the real issue here. Forget about your friends, what the hell were you thinking? What are you two going to do about this kid on the way?
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    517
    We do not know her side of the story and if her and your friends are getting into arguments YOU NEED to step in, they shouldn't be arguing at all! that is so wrong. Why are you letting your friends get that involved with your life that it is effecting your relationship and they are arguing/calling your girlfriend names?

    You sound very young but guess what friends aren't the most important people in an ADULT life and you need to start acting like an adult man. You got a girl pregnant, tough luck but you are stuck with her for the rest of your life. I find it VERY SAD you got her pregnant after only 6 months, its pathetic really as now you are stuck in this long term commitment.

    Make the mother of your unborn child feel like number ONE in your life and also don't let your 'friends' argue and call the woman who going to have your child names. Maybe then she back off and stop teeling you to ditch your friends.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    14,110
    Yes, if she was not pregnant when this happened, we would have been done.
    Honey... do not stay with this girl just because she is pregnant. That is not good for you, it is not good for her and MOST of all, it not good for the child to watch his/her parents at each others throat and not loving one another equally and with tranquility.

    You do not have to look after her (she made her bed and so did you) but you do have responsibility for financial and loving support to your offspring. Make sure you have equal visitation rights. Not to be rude, but just how far along is she according to the doctor, and are you sure this baby is yours? You barely even got your "foot" in the "door" and shes pregnant.

    She'll be upset that you're not around for her but she will eventually get over you. You don't even really know one another.

    As I said, please learn to wrap it up. Your whole future has just been re-written because of this mistake.

    Good luck.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 20-06-11 at 11:25 PM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

Similar Threads

  1. Problems with Ex girlfriend.
    By freakyfresh in forum Love Advice forum
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 17-05-11, 01:57 PM
  2. girlfriend problems.
    By kennyitzback in forum Ask a Female Forum
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 10-02-11, 12:21 PM
  3. Problems with my girlfriend
    By boy (17) in forum Ask a Female Forum
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 30-07-08, 10:02 PM
  4. Problems with girlfriend....
    By hah2110 in forum Intimate Forum
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 15-08-07, 03:25 AM
  5. Girlfriend Problems
    By OpticalIllusion in forum Love Advice forum
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-10-04, 06:25 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •