is this guy worth my time?

[iamminzy]

I met this guy online in January and I thought he was really great but I didn't put a lot of trust in our relationship because he told me he dated other girls and put me on first on the list... first on the list which means if he finds the right one he will dump me? We're not girlfriend-boyfriend yet. In late March, he suddenly ignored me and I thought maybe it was cuz I said whatever to him and hung up cuz he told me he wanted to eat dinner with me the day before and then early morning he said he's not and then he says he wants to see me and then change his mind.

Every since day 2, we made out and like almost every week we made out. I think I gave him too much and he sort of abused it. When I think of the reason why he bailed on me was because he was horny and maybe he thought it wasn't a good idea? then 2 days later he told me why he didn't contact me was because he was busy? But why can't he pick up the phone? But the main reason why he ignored me was because he didn't know if I wanted to have childrens in the future or not and would want to move in with him in a year.... He said we will be a couple after he came back from vacation and well yea... I called it quits because he keep pestering whether I want to move in with him or not and I said my dad might let me be able to move out and he said that they don't even know him and that maybe in a year they will let me move in with him. he lives 40 mins away from me which isn't that far, but still consider far considering traffic jam and rush hour. Anyways, later on he asked me few more times and I'm scared; it will be a big change for me. So I lied and said that my mom said she won't let me move in with him when he asked me again and I said we should just be friends.


He is 29 and I am 23. He is hitting the big 30 and he's thinking of his future while my theme is have fun and do whatever. I am not ready to think about the future and moving in with someone.

PLease don't say I need to grow up because I live in an Asian family and we tend to stick together especially since I am their only girl and the youngest.

But wait there is more, we stopped chatting for the time being and suddenly we started chatting online and then he "all a sudden" appear at my house and met my dad and my dad thinks we got something going on.... and I was surprised. I was speechless because I never expected him to step in front of my door and hand me a gift which is strange... But he asked me if I wanted to go to the acquarium with his friends and I went. He didn't pay for any of my meals maybe because we weren't moving forward and still in that friend zone.

Sometimes I wonder what happen if we were a couple sometimes I don't wanna imagine such things because I have my own insecurities. He told me he liked me the best, but I don't know if he only wants to make out since he giving me that impression that he's that type of guy. Anyways I am trying to move on because I feel he's not worth my time, but right now he tried to make me jealous of something and told me he thinks this girl is fun and want to see her again. is he playing games with me to see how I will react or what is he doing? It's sucks...

[bulrush]

You seem to have major insecurities about sex, which will cause major problems in all your relationships, unless you find a guy who simply doesn't want sex. You are 23 and you only "make out"?? Do what you are comfortable with, but I still see sex issues here.

This guy wants sex, and you don't. So you are incompatible. So find another guy. That's my opinion.