What should I say in my text reply?

[desy1978]

OK. There's this new girl at work who I'm really keen on and have been socialising with a little. We went cycling together and with friends too which seems to be the way she wants it. I've been wanting to spend time with her alone so asked her out on a date. She side stepped my offer by suggesting we went with other friends but I said it would be nice if we were alone like a proper date. She did say yes but it seemed a little awkward. I know she's been going walking with a friend of mine from work who is keen for us to go walking as a group so I don't think he's interested in her for a variety of reasons but I could be wrong.

So today I texted her asking her if she wanted to go walking with me early next week when we're both off and she texted back:

'Hey, I'm seeing some friends on those nights but just to let you know I'm happy to do stuff just as friends. Thanks hope that's cool'

You'll probably all say 'Get over her and look for someone else' but I've not lost hope yet and want to keep my chances alive. At least I know where I stand with her now and to be honest I'm gutted but what should I say to her in my text back? I'd like to show that I'm disappointed but I don't want to spoil our friendship and working relationship. Of course I'm hoping it's just a bad time for her and that I may have a chance in the future.

What should I say?

[simonmagus]

You have to at least pretend that you respect her decision. Keep hanging out with her and her friends but show her more attention than the others. Try to get to know her better. But don't bring up the dating thing until some time has passed. Give her some time to warm up to you. Try to act confident and remain oblivious to her opinion of you. As far as the specific text message, that is up to you, but follow my advice and you should be alright.

[simonmagus]

Oops. I am a guy posting in the "ask a female" forum. How stupid of me! Maybe you shouldn't listen to me...

[smackie9]

Oops. I am a guy posting in the "ask a female" forum. How stupid of me! Maybe you shouldn't listen to me...

It's ok a lot of us women post in the ask men forum.

[smackie9]

Factoid: It takes a girl/woman about 7 seconds to decide whether or not you are BF material. Doing to slowly get to know be, be friends crap does not work. She has already made her decision that she is not interested in you. You are friend zoned. Let this be a lesson, that you need to be more confident, and not focus your attention on one girl. Always flirt, be bold, with many all at once....this will stir the instinct in them to compete for you. Good luck.

[desy1978]

Thanks for your opinions. Maybe I am friend zoned but it's not from want of trying as I've flirted where possible and asked her out. It's through trying that she's let me know what she feels. I supposed I've forced her into giving me an answer which is what I really needed at the moment.

[smackie9]

Like I said don't focus on one, flirt with other girls around them.

[desy1978]

Yeah I should try that more although it's a bit dodgy at work and has got me into bother before!.

Anyway I texted her back. I just said 'Yeah that's cool' and said that I hoped she'd been able to enjoy the weather today.

I'm feeling a bit better about things now I've texted her but my main worry now is that she might have a thing with the other guy at work. I'd find that difficult to deal with.

[smackie9]

Well I give this warning to everyone....don't date coworkers. When things go bad with the relationship, things get bad at work, it creates a hostile work environment. People around you gossip about it, it can affect your work and someone may get fired over it. It's not worth it if you want to keep your job.

[desy1978]

To a certain extent yes, but she's a seasonal worker and will finish in September anyway.