does it mean he'll cheat??

[salena]

earlier my boyfriend left his email account open on my laptop so i was looking just a little and saw that he had opened an email he got from an online adult dating website. he has an account on there and i noticed he has a lot of spam in his email but the only ones he opens are from this adult website. its like those one where you can meet people to have sex with... not just the usual dating ones. his told me that he USED to be on online dating websites before he met me but i didnt think it'd be the ones you have one night stands on!

i'm paranoid that he goes onto these websites to meet other woman.. do you think he'll cheat or is he just looking?

[Golfer]

Be smart about it. If you ask him he will just say no, but you won't know if he's telling the truth or not.

Go onto the site and make a fake account yourself then message him with something flirty and ultimately suggest meeting up..

His response will tell you whats going on. Some would say that this is being sneaky or dishonest, but it's the only way you'll ever truly know, and he shouldn't be actively perusing sites like that if he's in a relationship so I say play him at his own game.

I signed up to one years ago when I was single and I still get spam from them, I just signed up to have a look and not actually use the site, so his actions may be harmless!

[reeba]

First, it is impossible to get rid of the spam from any 'dating site'. Once they get your email address, you will be spammed for years. So the spam is no concern. And occassionally openning the spam, I would say is no big deal either. Believe it or not, even when I was in a realtionship, I would open the spam because sometimes it was fun to take a look, or read an article.

Second, I agree about the 'fake profile'. I did this once, and busted a guy I was dating red handed. I didn't even email him. I thought that would be entrapment. I set up what would be enticing to him, and he was on it 12 hours later. So what are you going to do once you know? You need an exit plan if you find out the worst scenerio. Once you do this sneaky thing you can't go thinking you can talk it out? Would you ever trust him again?

Third, maybe he is just sexting a little for entertainmnt. He probably views this as harmless as looking at porn. Personally I would rather have a guy do porn than sexting. There is no contact that could get out of hand with porn.

[Wakeup]

I wonder how old the two that would set up fake accounts are? Is it an age thing to do shit like that? *shrugs*

Op: First off, shame on you for snooping. What you did is akin to opening up his snail mail and reading it. Would you open up his post office delivered mail? Second. Tell him that he left his mail open and you know that he is opening up his emails from the Adult HookUp site and you'd like him to delete his account. See what he says about that. If he hesitates or refuses to then you have your answer. If he has no qualms about deleting his account then it's quite likely that you can trust that he wants to keep you as his only sex partner.

If you can't trust him then you need to break up now because if you have no trust then you're just going through the motions and being angst ridden and insecure. What fun is that?

Don't play any games. Two wrongs don't make a right and setting a guy up for failure is a self-defeating shit test. Communication and trust two corner stones to a happy, healthy long term committment work your communication skills on this.

Good luck.