Advice on situation

[lebeau]

Here's the situation. The girl im currently going out with(not my gf yet) had a thing with an old friend of mine, he's not my friend anymore cus this girl used to be my best friend and he treated her like shit and started talking behind my back so we just stopped talking, it didnt end bad. The thing is when i started going out with her she told me they had sex, i thought they were only messing around. This complicates things a lot since she's one of those girls that thinks you must only be with the right one.
She never had anything seriousy with him cus he was an asshole and only used her to get layed which she agreed to cus she was in love with him. Some months later she and I started our thing, which we agreed was only until she had to go on vacations. She left, i went where she was and asked her to be my gf, but she said no. Later when i got home after that she told me she was only going to ask me for one thing, to let her talk him one more time to see if she still has feelings for him. So as it turns out, there's three options now. They talk and if, 1)She has feelings for him still she will let me know and we cant be togrther definitely. 2) He being the dick he is tries to get laid once more and hits on her(if she agrees she still has feelings too) but I will take this a sign and end this myself, and 3) She doesnt feel the same for him and tells me we can be together.
However, if 3 happens, i still wont be satisfied as I waited for her and gave her this chance after she already told me no. Right now he hasnt appeared yet to talk to her but we've been going out normally and doing the usual. So what do you think? Should I wait? Should I end this now? I love this girl so much however I cannot let her think she can ask me things like this whenever she likes or do anything similar.

[MerryH]

What she's asking you to do seems very unfair. Basically, she's asking you to sit back and wait for her while she gives it another shot with her ex, and if that doesn't work out, then yeah, okay, she'll date you. Doesn't sound like a good start to a relationship. Find someone who isn't still hung up on her ex.

[mhyzkie]

well I think you're the only one who could really answer her question. as what I've learned about love, it is unconditional and unselfish. as unfair or as complicated as it may seem, sometimes loving someone does make the person look stupid in other people's perspective. but hey, whatever it is that makes you happy, go for it. right now, you got two choices. either you give her more time to figure things out,go with the flow, be her friend, give her your full support, and respect whatever her decision may be. or think about yourself and worry that you might just get hurt and look stupid... which I believe wouldn't really hurt you much if you see the person you love is happy with her decision. up to you, take time andrelax. don't think about what's the right thing to do , just listen to what your heart says. good luck