I think I blew it with my baby...

[EmptyChurch]

The woman I've been seeing is (i think) pulling away from me. And worse yet, I think she's drifting toward another guy.

Things were fine between us until back in April I asked her if I could join her and her girlfriend in the bedroom. (Yes, she's bi and she has a girlfriend also.) It's kinda been a downhill slide since then.

We got into it pretty good too when I told her another friend of hers was sending me topless pics of herself. Me and this friend of hers had been talking and flirting on facebook... then she just sent me the pics one day. I'm a guy, what do you expect. Of course I looked. I only told my girlfriend because I wanted to be honest and not hide it from her.

A while back... (and this was a long while back, before she was my girlfriend) she had a one night stand with this guy named A. Well, thats what we'll call him. His name is Aaron, but I want to make the A stand for asshole, that's just me though, lol.

A couple months ago she told me she ran into him at a friend's house. At the time I didn't think anything of it. I knew she slept with him a long time ago... but so what? She has a past just like I do.

Then he ends up on her facebook friends list. I friended him too, just because I wanted to look at his profile. I've seen the flirty little comments he makes to her on her wall. I've gritted my teeth and said nothing this whole time. She has flirted back a little. Then a couple weeks ago he commented on one of my status updates. And she responded to his comment. She didn't even address my update. And then the two of them have this flirtatious exchange back and forth on MY status update!!! I was livid... But I didn't say anything. I was thinking "Who the hell does this jerkoff think he is???

Then the other night I texted her at around midnight. She's been spending a lot of time at her friend Emily's place. And guess who is one of Emily's roomates... A, Emily and Emily's boyfriend all three live together. So I texted her at around midnight and asked her what she was up to. She said "Sitting around the fire." Now, her and Emily always have a camp fire going when she's over there. SO I knew right away she was at Emily's. I texted her "Just you and Em?" And she answered back, "No, Em went to bed, me and Aaron." I felt sick to my stomach. I didn't text her again that night.

The next day I asked her what time she made it home. She said she left Emily's place at around 6am. I asked her what she was doing all that time, and she said they just sat and talked. Seriously... How many guys are gonna sit by a camp fire for 6 hours and talk to some chick unless they are trying to get some??? She had an injured leg on Sat. It wasn't debilitating, but still causing her a lot of pain. I wonder if it wasn't for that if she would have slept with him.

SO, what do you all think? IS she pulling away? Is she cheating? What should I do?

[VincenzoG91]

You should get tested for STDs.

[EmptyChurch]

I do, regularly. Why do you suggest that though?Because I didn't ask in my post if I should be worried about STDs or not.

[celestina]

You flirt and fool around with her girlfriend(s) and expect this not to impact on her, emotionally? Bi or not, a girl needs to feel special, dude. It's obvious that things went downhill because you've been paying too much attention to her girlfriends. I don't blame her for wanting to hang out with someone else who's less of a sleaze.

[Wakeup]

She doesn't value you, she doesn't respect you, she takes you for granted and she flirts with other men, has one-on-one time with past lovers and SHE HAS A FEMALE lover that she does not want you being included in on. WTF do you think you should do?

You don't respect her and the two of you are in what I would refer to as a dysfunctional, codependent relationship...
She plays you like fiddle.

Don't let anyone let you to believe this is all your fault. It's an matter of equal dysfunction and disrespect.

*Bi or not, a girl needs to feel special, dude.

How biased of you. What about her making him feel special? She leaves him to go carpet munching while he's suppose to wait like a good little boy for her?

It's all just sad in a hilarious sorta way. lol, lol, lol...

[celestina]

Oh yeah, as for the FB thingie... that's just ridiculous and immature. I would just delete them both.

[EmptyChurch]

She doesn't value you, she doesn't respect you, she takes you for granted and she flirts with other men, has one-on-one time with past lovers and SHE HAS A FEMALE lover that she does not want you being included in on. WTF do you think you should do?

You don't respect her and the two of you are in what I would refer to as a dysfunctional, codepended relationship...
She plays you like fiddle.

Don't let anyone let you to believe this is all your fault. It's an matter of equal dysfunction and disrespect.

How biased of you. What about her making him feel special? She leaves him to go carpet munching while he's suppose to wait like a good little boy for her?

It's all just sad in a hilarious sorta way. lol, lol, lol...

Just for the record, she had the girlfriend before I came along. I don't have a problem with her having a girlfriend. It's just sex between them, there are no feelings. And also, she was ok with me joining them in bed. It was her girlfriend that wasn't. I made the mistake of taking that out on her and that's why we argued about it.

[EmptyChurch]

Oh yeah, as for the FB thingie... that's just ridiculous and immature. I would just delete them both.

Yea... I think I will delete him, but not her. I wonder if she did that to show me how it feels... Considering I flirt out in the open with some of her female friends on there. Sometimes even on her status updates.

[Wakeup]

Oh, well then just disregard the parts of my post about her and her lover and keep everything else I said in mind... should you care to, of course.

[EmptyChurch]

Oh, well then just disregard the parts of my post about her and her lover and keep everything else I said in mind... should you care to, of course.

So, you think I should feel threatened by this other guy?

[Wakeup]

I think you should break up with your current girlfriend. The disrespect and taking for granted and apathy and dysfunction is beyond repair. You two were not meant to be life partners.

If you want to try to get back respect and loving action toward one another than you both need to grow up and sit down with one another and actually have a solid conversation about relationship boundaries and which ones neither one of you will cross on the other. You fly by the seat of your pants and when one's getting more attention than the other from members of the opposite sex (in her case either sex) then and only then do you notice one another the way you should be.

Its not a healthy, happy, angst free union by any means.

[MerryH]

I wonder if she did that to show me how it feels... Considering I flirt out in the open with some of her female friends on there. Sometimes even on her status updates.

You are such a hypocrite.

Also, you're not going to get relevant advice if you leave out certain key details like you did. You left out the fact that she's also married in addition to banging you and another girl, AND that you have a girlfriend of several decades who you live with and have children with.

[HeartIsAching]

She doesn't value you, she doesn't respect you, she takes you for granted and she flirts with other men, has one-on-one time with past lovers and SHE HAS A FEMALE lover that she does not want you being included in on. WTF do you think you should do?

You don't respect her and the two of you are in what I would refer to as a dysfunctional, codependent relationship...
She plays you like fiddle.

Don't let anyone let you to believe this is all your fault. It's an matter of equal dysfunction and disrespect.

How biased of you. What about her making him feel special? She leaves him to go carpet munching while he's suppose to wait like a good little boy for her?

It's all just sad in a hilarious sorta way. lol, lol, lol...

Exactly what I was going to say. She's disrespecting you, you're disrespecting her, it's time to GTFO.

[Wakeup]

You are such a hypocrite.

Also, you're not going to get relevant advice if you leave out certain key details like you did. You left out the fact that she's also married in addition to banging you and another girl, AND that you have a girlfriend of several decades who you live with and have children with.

Oh... My... God ...

*laughing my ass off here*

Troll?

[EmptyChurch]

I'm not a troll.