Help!

[nasf62]

Hey girls,

I'm new to the forum so I apologize if this is an odd thing to ask but I'm looking for advice about my girlfriend.

I guess I will start off from the beginning, I was cheated on back in February and it hurt me a lot so my ex-girlfriend and I broke up. Later on in March I met my now current girlfriend. We had in interesting start, we decided it would be fun to be Friends With Benefits because we both were single. She was still a virgin at the time so we did the classic "everything but sex". After a while of hanging out though we fell for each other and started dating. We have always had little spats here and there but recently the arguments have been getting worse. She claims to be tired a lot and naps after she works so I dont get to see her after work a ton. Today in the middle of the afternoon a few hours after she got home (we don't live together) she came online (skype) and we were talking, she wasnt responding much and was giving short answers. I sent her a video call and she denied saying she was busy. When I asked what she was up to she said I should stop being so nosey. I said I was just wondering what was up, to which she replied "none of your business", then I said it bothers me when she acts all secretive about things and she said it bothers her when I get so nosey. She still wont tell me what she was doing and Im getting a little worried because she always has guys after her and she never gives them the "just friends talk" because she says she doesnt want to be mean. Ive been cheated on before and she knows that, she always says she hates cheaters but I can't help being a little suspicious!

Girls, help! Am I just being an over protective nut? or should I be worried? What do I do?

P.s. - It's hard to have a calm sit down conversation about these things with her because she gets worked up and angry with me.

[MerryH]

I sent her a video call and she denied saying she was busy. When I asked what she was up to she said I should stop being so nosey. I said I was just wondering what was up, to which she replied "none of your business", then I said it bothers me when she acts all secretive about things and she said it bothers her when I get so nosey.

The way you tell this story, it sounds like she overreacted and was really bitchy and is probably hiding something. But I'm going to guess that this is one of those things where each party has a very different interpretation of what happened. Maybe your questions sounded a lot more accusatory than a simple, innocent, "Hey what are you up to?" Or maybe she feels that you're too nosy and invasive in general, and this incident was the last straw before she finally called you on it. Do you think that's the case? Are you nosy and intrusive? Think about it.

Aside from that, she sounds very immature if she "doesn't want to be mean" to guys who want to date her, and if she's not able to have a calm conversation about anything. If you're okay with having a rocky relationship because of the immaturity of one (or both) of you, then deal with it, I guess. But most people wouldn't want that.