is it possible to get a (Leo) man back after he breaks up with you?

[KatieB99]

Hi everyone,

sorry to bore you with my things but I just cannot stop thinking about this situation thus decided to seek some advice.

I shall make this as brief as possible

I was in a long-distance relationship with a French guy for a year. We had our ups and downs. I have to admit we argued a lot because we both are quite stubborn and want things our way, but he is also pretty selfish. Nonetheless, I do love him a lot. lately, we had yet another big fight,and then i said i did not want to be with him anymore (which happened before too, nothing new there), but the next day i changed my mind and asked him to talk things over, but he did not let me, he said it's over and asked not to contact him anymore.

is there anything i can do to get him back??? the more time passes by the more i miss him and realise that i dont want to loose him

[MaidenMinx]

Sounds like you already lost him...

[Jenswaiting]

I agree with MM. I want to point out that he probably got tired of you messing him about. Being flaky in a relationship and not knowing what you really want only hurts the other person. Next time don't break up in the heat of the moment. Let the emotions pass, think rationally and then make a decision.

[HeartIsAching]

No. Your astrological signs are in the house of Atreides and under the influence of the Sith. Besides which, a LDR with a cheese-eating surrender monkey isn't really a romance, is it?

[devonbrown]

I agree that he probably got tired of you going back and forth about what you want.

Long distance doesn't kill relationships, but it does magnify any problems in the relationship already.

Unfortunately, there is nothing more you can do at this point. If he wants to get back with you, it is up to him to initiate things.

[Wakeup]

but he did not let me, he said it's over and asked not to contact him anymore.

is there anything i can do to get him back??? the more time passes by the more i miss him and realise that i dont want to loose him

You're long distance and you have'nt got a perpetual honeymoon period?

There is nothing worth missing here and you're simply addicted to the familiarily, drama, sex? and you're just too lazy to start new and find someone within easy dating distance.

Give me one good reason why you think you love this man.

[KatieB99]

a reason why i think i love this man?

let me put it this way: when i start thinking of reasons i can more easily come up of those why i should not love him/be with him but...being with him is hard but being without him is so much harder

[devonbrown]

being with him is hard but being without him is so much harder

That is because you have an addiction to being with someone. Now that that person is gone, there is an emptiness when you used to talk to him, etc. That feeling of lonliness goes away a lot faster than the pain of being in an unhealthy relationship.

You don't love him, you love having a boyfriend.

[Wakeup]

being with him is hard but being without him is so much harder

Total, total codependence and fear of being alone along with unable to accept that you are not in control. Here's a bit advice that if you can grasp and apply some logical insight to will make you get over this man quicker than you thought possible:

You cannot conrol anyone but yourself.

Once you understand that concept and accept it, you will not have a hard time leaving him out of your life for good.

You cannot control him and he doesn't give you what you want. What is the logical thing to do in a situation like that?


You might benefit from (once again I sound like a broken record) reading "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie. It's for people like you who are sad, frustrated and pissed off from trying to control outcomes and failing at it.

i can more easily come up of those why i should not love him

That says a lot about your lack of self-worth and respect for yourself. Work on you and learning about self-respect and you'll easily find a man that respects you also because you'll not let yourself become vulnerable to anyone that shows you less.