Girlfriend's past relationships

[mir]

I am going to make it quick. I have been dating my gf for about a year now and about 5 months ago she told me that she had one more ex than what she has told me before and she didn't wanted to tell about him since I know him. Since that day I am kind of trapped with these negative thoughts that come and go. What I am really asking is that is there anyone with the same issue and if so did it go away and how? I do care about her a lot she is the first person I fell for and before her I haven't had done a lot but I it is not like I was a virgin either.

[Cerby]

This depends, do you feel she lied to you or just kept part of her past from you. If you feel she lied, you might have something you need to address with yourself or with her. If she just held back part of her past, then thats different. Its not REALLY your business who she dated and slept with in her past.

Personally I don't ask and don't tell. I know my current gf has been with FAR more people than I have, but I don't let it bother me. Its all about the here and now, she is with me and happy, what more could I ask for?

[bluesummer]

This seems like a non-issue to me. She dated someone you knew, she was worried about the effect it would have on the relationship (therefore implying she wants to be in the relationship), and just omitted it to keep things 'happy'. A lot of people have jealousy issues when it comes to exes, and it seemed she was obviously concerned about telling you INITIALLY in case it was going to ruin things. She did tell you after all, right?

If you trust her, let it go.

[lucacoleman]

I completely agree with bluesummer. It's a non-issue and she brought it up just to make things clear. But she doesn't want to name names so that you can still preserve the friendship with that ex.

[carl1222]

I'm on the fence here.

I agree that details of her past relationships are none of your business.

But when the past relationship involved a current friend of yours, it's a pretty important omission.

I don't question her motives for not telling you, but I think you deserve to know about it. Did she tell you who it is?

[Devilsbane]

I am an honesty is the best policy kind of person. I can usually respect when someone comes out and admits that they lied. I also think of it like a parent would a child. If you punish for doing the right thing then there is no longer any reason to tell the truth. Get what I'm saying?

But that really depends on what the lie was. You didn't really give a lot of info about the ex.

[Belle13]

Maybe she just wanted to protect your relationship and she is afraid to ruin your relationship because of his ex that you knew. She just do it because she loves you.

[mwahahaha]

Sounds like your brother dude. Confrontation is unavoidable here. Good luck with the swine.

[tedjones14]

You need to simply talk with her if it's upsetting you - she hid it from you to help avoid you getting upset. If you're concerned, you two should just work it out.

[oldskool83]

your over reacting