She wants us to live apart for a while

[shopstartuk]

Hi,

After being together for nearly 2 years and very happy, my girlfriend now wants us to live apart. We both came out of failing marriages and are in our mid 40s. She has a 17 year old daughter who was living with her dad and stepmum but they fell out so she moved in with us. Now, my partner wants to be independant and support her daughter on her own. We were supposed to move into a new house soon and I want to be there for both of them but her daughter doesn't want to move. My partner says this is something she has never done and she needs space and time to do it, she has recently got a good job that takes her away at times.

I feel rejected and confused but she said I need to let her do it otherwise I will lose her. She said she that we aren't breaking up and will still spend several nights a week with me and we will still spend most of the time together that we already do. She says she loves me and that she just needs to get this out of her system.

I really would appreciate advice from anyone and would be interested how other people are getting on in the same or simiar situation.

[Kyrina]

Her daughter is back in her life in a permanent kind of way and her mom see's her ex breakup as another kind of failure against her daughter, natural instincts tell us to protect our kids from everything that hurts them and at the moment the daughter is hurting from the breakup even if she doesnt show it or admit it, the mother is basically wanting to concentrate on the kid for a time.Yes its hard for you both but i understand your thinking,she has a hell of a lot to handle at the moment new job, daugther as such and maybe she feels secure in your relationship to ask for the time apart.However it could be the beginning of the end but you dont have a lot of choice she says she will leave if you dont,and well i think she means it we dont often give ultmatiums without already thinking of the consequences.
The question is do you trust her to give her the time she needs or do you think its the end for you both, only you know her and being optimistic i would rather give the person the time and take the consequences because hell you will lose either way if she is trying to end it with you or if she just needs time likes she says