To stay or leave

[jbrown12]

I know what I need to do in this situation but I was some opinions from people who are not my friends (sometimes I am unclear of their motives, maybe if they are jealous or not so I want an outside perspective). I met this guy in March 2011, we quickly clicked and began hanging out and talking everyday. We would go out together with our mutual friends. About two months after this, he started sleeping over. A month after that began (total of 3 months since we’ve started “talking”) I asked him about our relationship going to the next level, calling me his girlfriend and etc. He said he was not ready for a relationship and he ended up telling me he was “in love” with me. At this point, I was ready to put a label on our relationship but he was not. His reasoning was he had a bad breakup and did not want to ever lose me and that putting a title on it would mean if anything bad ever happened that he would lose me for good (This is what he said). I said ok and our relationship continued with any labels or true commitment. About 2-3 months passed, going out to dinner, sleeping over, having sex. We started going out together less and less and he was not inviting me out. He would only call me at 2:00am to come sleep over. I then found out he was “talking” to another girl and she showed me messages of him saying I really like you, I miss you, wish you were still here to this other girl. He told me he didn’t love her like he loved me. After this girl, I found out he was contacting his ex girlfriend (was with her for 4 years) telling her that he wanted a future with her and wanted to work things out and agreed to go to therapy with her to work on their relationship. He was telling me the same things at the same time. His excuse was, “I’ll always love that girl(his ex) she was my best friend for 4 years she knows everything about me”. He then went on to say, i love her, but I am “in love” with you. He tells me he is ready to open and start a new chapter of his life with me and wants to see what the future holds. Mind you, its been about 7 months of sleepovers,sex, and etc and he still won’t “date” me. I feel almost stupid typing this because everything says LEAVE and people are probably wondering what the hell I am doing still seeing this guy but its so hard to walk away because every time I try, I wonder, what if he really does love me, what if I’m throwing away this because I am selfish and want a label. He always says, if you truly love someone then a label should not matter. I just do not want to wonder “what if” later down the road if I potentially walked away from something that could of been great. What do you guys think?

[smackie9]

"What if he does really love me?" ....are you kidding me? He just comes over for sex, he doesn't want to be in a relationship, he starts pulling away from you, you find out he is talking to another girl, and his ex....No he does not love you, he is using you. Guys will say and do anything for sex, they will lie lie lie to get it. He lied about being in love with you, he lied about why he doesn't want a relationship....you are right, I don't know why you are here typing this crap out.You quoted " I feel almost stupid typing this because everything says LEAVE". No you ARE stupid, and yes you should leave. Good God girl, what the hell is wrong with you? This guy has manipulated you enough with his bull S hit. I'm sure your friends have been trying to knock some sense into you but they are not saying what you want to hear so you think you will hear different on here....NOT! Now go wash that guy out of your hair....he is starting to stink up the place.