Attacked and I am the bad guy

[bishopj28]

Hello, I am 30 years old. I have been dating a girl for 2 years. We argue a lot, sometimes they turn violent. Now I never hit her or attack her. But more and more lately I have been pushing back. Last night she tried to kick me and I grabbed her leg and lifted so she ended up losing her footing and falling on her ass. She got hurt. But that just made her more angry. She then started trying to punch me. Every time she punched at me, I blocked the punch and I tackled her to the ground. I kept telling her to stop but it happened 6ish times.

I told her my options are 1) call the cops when she gets violent. 2) leave this relationship or 3) defend myself when attacked. I would never hit her. I need to feel safe.

[HeartIsAching]

Hello, I am 30 years old. I have been dating a girl for 2 years. We argue a lot, sometimes they turn violent. Now I never hit her or attack her. But more and more lately I have been pushing back. Last night she tried to kick me and I grabbed her leg and lifted so she ended up losing her footing and falling on her ass. She got hurt. But that just made her more angry. She then started trying to punch me. Every time she punched at me, I blocked the punch and I tackled her to the ground. I kept telling her to stop but it happened 6ish times.

I told her my options are 1) call the cops when she gets violent. 2) leave this relationship or 3) defend myself when attacked. I would never hit her. I need to feel safe.

Get out and get out now.

[bishopj28]

Well I will consider it. But I would not like that because I do love her,and she is the mother of my child.

[Benni]

HeartIsAching is right. She won't change, it may even get worse to the point you DO hit back, then you may have a domestic violence charge against you. You really need to leave.

[bishopj28]

This is bishopj28 girlfriend I suggest not giving advice if you don't have the true facts, not a professional, and do not know the situation and/or people involved. What was said is not at all what happened.. He would have been arrested if I would have answered the door to the cops that I had to call.

[HeartIsAching]

Well I will consider it. But I would not like that because I do love her,and she is the mother of my child.

If she calls the cops and says you hit HER, you're going to jail. I know whereof I speak.

You do NOT want a violent crime record following you around for the rest of your life.

[MynameisJesus]

Agreed. GTFO as quickly as possible.
Ending the relationship should not be an option but a logical consequence.
You don't have to be a female to be abused and disrespected

[surfhb]

Well I will consider it. But I would not like that because I do love her,and she is the mother of my child.

This is bishopj28 girlfriend I suggest not giving advice if you don't have the true facts, not a professional, and do not know the situation and/or people involved. What was said is not at all what happened.. He would have been arrested if I would have answered the door to the cops that I had to call.

LOL! Tweedledee and Tweedledum! This is a ****ing internet relationship forum numbnuts! We have to assume the info is correct. Pfffsstt! You guys actually breed children?

So what was the true story?

[HeartIsAching]

This is bishopj28 girlfriend I suggest not giving advice if you don't have the true facts, not a professional, and do not know the situation and/or people involved. What was said is not at all what happened.. He would have been arrested if I would have answered the door to the cops that I had to call.

And just who the hell are you to tell me what to do? Somebody has obvious control issues. See a professional.

[bulrush]

Per my lawyer: In Michigan you cannot defend yourself by striking or holding a person. In a self-defense case you are automatically guilty of assault unless you prove otherwise. In other words, you need 2 reliable witnesses (without a jail record) or a videotape of the incident. And in Michigan, since you are a man, you are automatically guilty of assault in a domestic case unless you prove otherwise. What I mean is, the police automatically arrest you in a domestic assault case. They do not have a lot of leeway in this. Then you see a judge and try to prove you are innocent.

Remember: guilty until proven innocent, just like in France!

The other thing is, she will never change, but you can leave before you get trapped in jail.