I'm 16, she's 25

[youngandinlove]

Hello all,
I'm new here and the reason I'm sharing with you my story is because I need advice and am not comfortable with sharing this to the people I know.
First of all, what is your opinion on my case? The truth is I'm only 16 and she's turning 25 soon. We've been together June. For those of you who are curious, we haven't made love and kissing is limited because there are 'dangers' which I'm about to tell you.
We met at the gym. She's a pretty, petite girl and I fell for her the moment i saw her for the very first time. Thank God she was interested in me too and she started to build our relationships. At that time, she was having a bf. This guy is 24 and studying abroad. Her relationship with him was falling apart anyway, but they've managed to be loyal for nearly 4 years, until my arrival. I did not and still not feel guilty. She, on the other side, tortured herself for nearly a month, saying how much she hurt him and all the crap that drove me crazy.
Now here is the problem. Her mom found out about me when she invited me to watch a play with her mom (her dad is deceased and she feels protected and secured when I'm around) and she disapproved me right away. We almost broke up. It was a hell of a week for us. Her mom did not shout at her or anything. She simply cried and that broke my gf's heart. We're still together now but in secrecy. Her bro knows about me and shouted at her at first but my gf cried a lot so her bro accepted and allow her to go out with me. To me, he's a dick but I can't blame him for taking on the father role.
She loves me more than anyone ever has and sacrifices a lot for me, which i do not feel comfortable to share with you guys. I'm sorry. As a student in an International School, I am expected to study abroad too. But i fought for my first love (yes, she is my first gf and the only girl i ever felt attracted towards) and my parent finally approved of her. In fact, my family and us have eaten dinner together outside 3 times. My dad is quite fond of her and is happy for me to have found a true lover.
My gf and I do argue sometimes. It's not a perfect relationship to be honest, but we love each other more than words can describe.
She has had 4 bfs before. But they she did not love them the way she loves me, since (she told me and i believed her) i am the only one she feels attracted towards this much. For a woman to give up on the guy she was in love with for 4 years and was proposed by him, and to face all troubles with her family and to love in secrecy is such an unspeakable pain. I love her so much and it hurts to see her suffering like this. We see each other every day for now. We would either go cafe, gym, or cinema.
Here's the thing i want to ask you guys. I fear that my love for her one day may run out because all the troubles i have to go through. Don't get me wrong. I love her more than my own life but i just afraid that something will cause me to lose directions and do the wrong thing. She has had more experience than me so the fact that she has chosen me proves that she will be loyal to me. I plan to marry her after the IB program. But will i get to that point or my love will be depleted by time.
Please help and give me advice.
V

[youngandinlove]

BTW, I'm an A star material student so don't worry. I know my responsibility to take care of my gf when i grow up so i can never be careless on my education

[bulrush]

You have only been going out for 3 months or so, and you are planning marriage? Maybe you should get to know her first. It takes 12+ months to really get to know someone. I'm glad you are happy but what is the reason for rushing, other than your hormones?

[Boisdevie]

What kind of advice are you looking for? Do you really want my opinion? I expect you want me to say 'hell, yes, go for it. Your love for her will conquer all problems. You'll end up married and be happy for ever and ever just like in a Disney film'.

Or do you want to hear my real opinion/advice. I doubt it.

[Mathias]

What kind of advice are you looking for? Do you really want my opinion? I expect you want me to say 'hell, yes, go for it. Your love for her will conquer all problems. You'll end up married and be happy for ever and ever just like in a Disney film'.

Or do you want to hear my real opinion/advice. I doubt it.

Why are you playing the victim without actually giving advice, and without actually getting backlash?

Weird.

[Wakeup]

BTW, I'm an A star material student so don't worry. I know my responsibility to take care of my gf when i grow up so i can never be careless on my education

Oh my god

Why are you playing the victim without actually giving advice, and without actually getting backlash?

Weird.

Was there advice in that statement? (rhetorical)

[Cerby]

I'm sorry to say that this simply won't last. a 9 year difference at such a young age is more than enough reason to fail. You still have 2 years of highschool left, she is getting into real life (at least I hope so).

Plus you're so young and naive that you actually believe her when she says she has never loved anyone like you. Most people with experience know their SO will always tell them this, especially if they're insecure. This will be a great learning experience for you, but unless she is mentally still in her teens, she will eventually move on once you start going into 16 year old jealous hormonal rages everytime she wants to go out with her friends and you can't go because you're still 3-5 years away from legal drinking age.

[Mathias]

Oh my god



Was there advice in that statement? (rhetorical)

Was there advice in THAT statement? (rhetorical answer to rhetorical question)

[Boisdevie]

OK to shut you up here's my advice:
It will not work. Ever. The age gap is simply massive.

[Wakeup]

Was there advice in THAT statement? (rhetorical answer to rhetorical question)

If you can answer a rhetorical question then so can I ... I am not the one who originally questioned a posters non-advice and while doing so, did exactly the same thing you were questioning. (not giving any advice to the Op) Looking rather hypocritical of you me thinks.

BTW: I agree with Bois's advice (that was quite obvious without further explanation) Oh yea!

[DoesntMatter]

Dude this is pretty hot. Hit it and quit it, you'll be the envy of all your friends

[Mathias]

If you can answer a rhetorical question then so can I ... I am not the one who originally questioned a posters non-advice and while doing so, did exactly the same thing you were questioning. (not giving any advice to the Op) Looking rather hypocritical of you me thinks.

BTW: I agree with Bois's advice (that was quite obvious without further explanation) Oh yea!

You crack me up.

[upandaway]

There are always exceptions, but I agree, with an age gap at the ages the two of you are at, coupled with the fact that you already have concerns that your love for her wont last, this relationship is destined to fail. You already know it.

[oldskool83]

so odd, live it up kid!

[bulrush]

OP, pursue this if you want, and learn from it, but I don't think it will last. You are still young, full of hormones which impair your judgement. I'm glad you are an "A" student, but book smarts is not the same as street smarts or actual wisdom. Do you even know what things you want in a lifetime mate? Maybe list them out for us. Also, the brain and personality continue to grow until about age 25. What you want now in a mate might change shortly.