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Thread: Help!! Relationship Advice from male POV

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    Help!! Relationship Advice from male POV

    Hi there,

    So I met this guy during my cousins wedding (he is one of my cousins really close friends). We both met at one of the get togethers during the wedding. At the time we were both quite drunk. Now we have been talking for over three months every single day. He had at that point recently broken up with his girlfriend of over four years. And because I knew that I tried not to become to attached with him. However, now I feel after talking to this guy for 3 months on a daily basis, meeting up whenever we're both free .. I'm coming to the point where I can just "keep talking".

    He for the last month or so been talking to me about sex, and we did agree on it. But the problem now is I recently found out that he is still in contact with his ex. When I asked him about whether he was still in contact with her .. he said "Don't worry about it, if there was anything of concern I would tell you."

    And he has mentioned to me that he does not want to get in a serious relationship and just want to go with the flow and see where things end up at with the both of us.

    My concern is whether he is just fooling around with me? I am also worried that if we both start having sex, thats the only thing thats going to have him be with me. I am just tripping out ... or does it seem as though he playing with my emotions.

    He does compliment me, tells me I have a nice body, great curves, he likes me, likes talking to me. But because his ex is kind of once again in the picture I don't know how to take these last three months as.

    Also: when we do talk on the phone, its for hours and we both do end up getting into quite in-depth conversations and its not always about sex or just "dirty talk". we both discuss a lot of personal things that seem to bother us, he's very good with giving advice when i need it. he tells me a lot about his experiences in life etc
    Last edited by mb7; 31-10-11 at 08:22 AM.

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    But the problem now is I recently found out that he is still in contact with his ex. When I asked him about whether he was still in contact with her .. he said "Don't worry about it, if there was anything of concern I would tell you."
    It might mean that he is now over her so there's no more need for no contact.
    If your think there might be something else , you probably should talk more about it with him.

    Quote Originally Posted by mb7 View Post
    I am also worried that if we both start having sex, thats the only thing thats going to have him be with me.
    I doubt there's any reason to be worried that he wouldn't value your friendship once you start having sex. He's spending way too much time with you to be interested in just sex.
    If you're hoping for something more than FWB well... according to you he did say that he does not want to get in a serious relationship. Even though I'd consider sex a requirement for a relationship deeper than friendship, I wouldn't count on it to change his mind.

    or does it seem as though he playing with my emotions.
    Doesn't seem like that to me.
    You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

  3. #3
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    I agree with YAG. He is spending a lot of time with you to want just sex, he wants more.

    As for contact with his ex, I don't approve, because it looks like he might get back together with her, and that makes him look bad. But some people are still friends with their ex after a breakup.
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

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