Moving In?

[stooper]

Hi,

I've been going out with my girlfriend for over 3 years now and I love her very much. I am 22 and she's 23 and both go to univeristy. We lived together for a year from October 2009 to October 2010. I decided to move out becuase I thought that I wanted to experience a little indepenence, which didn't go down well. She understood though and decided to stay with me. It has been a year now since I moved and I don't know whether to move back in again. I would like to live with her but I sometimes want to be able to be on my own, sleep on my own etc. I am very confused and don't know what to do. She seems to think that I decided to move out knowing that I wouldn't move back in with her again but that is not true. I just don't know when I will feel like I will want to live with her again. Am I being selfish, should I just let her go? She came over the other night to 'sort things out,' she said we should just be friends but I started crying and got very upset. Why did I cry if I didn't want to be with her? I am so confused, please help!

Stooper

[bulrush]

You started crying because you are emotionally attached to her. That is separate from being a viable long-term couple. You have to decide which you want more: her or your own apartment. You can't have both.

[Kaius]

Moving in together is for people who want to be together, and mature enough to handle being a couple.
If you need your space, then obviously you are not ready to be committed to one person.
Give yourself time....you are still young, and need not be tied down. Living together
is a BAD idea if you are not ready.

I never understood why young people want to live together, but don't want to get married. Maybe it's because it's easier to break up
when things turn bad. Perhaps we just want to live like adults even though we are really just kids inside.