Had an online fling, now I want my wife too?

[idontno]

Well kinda, i'm not sure what to do.i have been with my wife for 8 years now.

Ok so about 6 months ago i started talking to another girl over the internet, she is so far away that we would never meet. Things have gotten pretty hot between us and even going as far as having some fun on skype.

About a month ago before any pics or skyping happened my wife stumbled on our messages on facebook back and forth, some where pretty hot. I thought she may have found out but she didnt say anything to me so i checked her facebook messages and confirmed she was talking to someone about it.

Now this is where i should have stopped but instead i made a new facebook account, deleted all the messages and deleted the girl from my real account only to continue to talk to her on the new account and let things get even hotter. My wife then was talking to her friend on facebook how i must have stopped since the girl was deleted from my account and she still to this day has never mentioned it to me.

Now i have also started monitoring my wifes conversations, i started doing this when i noticed she had been talking to a guy on facebook and deleting the messages, it wasent anything bad really but i for some reason feel the need to over react to this.

After monitoring her i came across her talking to this guy we both know. He lives in the same city. She told him she had a sexy dream about him, that he was sexy and that she didnt mind him being in her dream.it has yet to go any further than that.

Now here is my delema, i want her to talk sexy with him. I think i know why....

After reading her saying this it hurt me, really did and i have completely stopped talking to this other girl. But i think i want to let her get even?

I have also thought about coming clean with her, yes she does already know but she doesent know i know she knows so if i just came out and told her than it would no longer be the elephant in the room.

I want her to get hot with this guy online too because that would create the perfect opportunity to bring it out in the open. How mad can she possibly get about something she already knew about and has started doing herself?

Now this all sounds great in theory but its completely stressing me out and does hurt me when I see her talking to him.

What do you think, i really want to play it so that she gets a little hot with this guy creating the opportunity and eveness that would make talking about it more comfortable for i think both of us but killing me watching her talk to him although i probably deserve it.

Thanks for reading my novel

[Wakeup]

So you're a dick so you want your wife to be as skanky just so you can bring up your bullshit behaviour. Have I got that right?

[idontno]

Well this is something she would be doing even if I didnt know it was happening, the method that I used to find this out is not something I will bring up so I am not going to tell her I know.

Its not like I am pushing her to do anything, if she does or doesent is under her own free will, I am just in a position to see when its about to go too far and come clean with her at that point.

[Wakeup]

So: you're hoping she's as bad as you so that she can't hold it against you? You cheat on her, you snoop on her and you don't know what you've got until you fear it will be taken away. Charming. O.o I have no advice for you other than to come clean and apologise and let the chips fall where they may.

[Jaguar.xiv]

I believe you explained very well about how NOT to be in a loving relationship. Figure out what you really want idontno then it would possible for you not to screw with the life feelings of others.