the clear sign

[oldskool83]

I'll keep this simple, made plans with some who i had been getting to know to have gotten blown off at the last minute, atleast it looks like a blow off to me. The excuse seemed lame which is fine if thats what makes them feel better, but I would'nt of asked for more dates from someone and set up more to blow them off at the last min, expescialy when they had told you they would change work schedule for a mid week get together.

I definetly got blind sided by this one, normaly you see a pattern not 100% on then next day your there thinking...yeah ok while scratching your head.

So its what it is, Im allowed to not fully not understand when a women keeps telling you I am so intrested in you, puts effort into seeing you and then boom, receive a simple text greating you, telling you some excuse why she cant show up and saying sorry, not to return a message back. I have new years even plans with her (she invited me). I can asume clearly where I stand now.... I should just let it go, I'm obviously not that important, so why tell me I am for the last month?

And for the record no i have'nt blown her up with text or phone calls asking why or anything, my reply to her blow off was a text saying yeah ok. And thats where I've let it. Im simply self digesting this, and now simply ran idea new years eve ideas as well.

Anyones thoughts?

[Vanessa]

Well, don't know the whole story, but is this a first or has she done this repeatedly? Maybe something actually happened? How are you so sure she's blowing you off?

On the other hand you can never really know what's going on in someone's mind, regardless of the things they tell you. You might not get to fully know someone in a lifetime...

[bulrush]

Call her today. Or reach her somehow today. If she doesn't confirm plans for New Years within 24 hours, then you can make new plans. If she won't communicate or follow through, she is not worth dating. Homey don't play games like dat. If she says she likes you but doesn't act like it, dump her.

[oldskool83]

about an hour ago i asked if plans were still on for new years. ill see what happens. i did look up the town she said she had to go to withher best friend and her fiance...it was 2 hours away. and she never pulled this before, never.

[bulrush]

She may have found someone else who is more compatible with her. That doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. So she doesn't want to end it because she is 1) weak or 2) doesn't want to hurt your feelings. Or she may want to date multiple people at the same time.

So it's up to you as to how much this annoys you. If her lack of communication annoys you, then find someone else.

[oldskool83]

thats the game i know how it games played. just see its totaly waist of 2 peoples time if (my date says i want to see your before saturday and i want more dates with you) for the next day of basicly never making any contact with me and using a lame text to tell me this.

people are ignorant, id never tell someone i wanna see them, tell them im thinking about them and then blow shit off. i would simply not even put my self into that situation.

My biggest issue with women is the type of behavior after they express when you mean to them. I didnt gain anything or loose anything if i have nothing, thats how i keep looking at things.

[bcgirl]

maybe she has a boyfriend?

[oldskool83]

its pointless to guess, no one the answer, only she does. if she does not wanna speak i cant make her, and wont. i use my gut when somthing seems odd, i totaly saw this comming since lunch yesterday....not sure why but somthing was deff wrong. trust your gut, hasnt failed me yet since i started to listen to it.

[jdawg24]

This girl you're talking about, have you been intimate at all with her? or is it just a girl you fancy?

If it's the latter then I'd wait it out until new years and see what happens. All is not lost, girls are very complicated and moody sometimes.
But if she pulls this shit again, then just forget about her, she isn't interested ENOUGH (she probably likes you, but not enough...) or else she would
have tried to reach you more.

[IndiReloaded]

If a guy was doing this to a gal, everyone would be telling her to drop him already.

Best case is, she's extremely rude. Worst case (which sounds like to me), she is already seeing or chasing someone else. Either way, you know its wrong. She must be hot for you to still be considering her. But bitchy, hot women are even more trouble b/c they think their rudeness is somehow justified.

Find a new date for new years eve, Oldskool. And have a great time.

[oldskool83]

shes done, no call or text or anything. i asked a different girl out, she jumped at the chance and wanted dinner that same night i asked her so i made plans with her now


i knew it was a blow off, im not stupid.
as for this women, it is very rude to make plans, more then 1 in the same week, set things up and then next day go get stupid. it doesnt fail me, even the over 30 croud cant be decent nuff to think right.

[IndiReloaded]

There are a lot of self-absorbed folks out there, oldskool. She was probably covering her bets to make sure she had a date for NYE. Seems people today treat dating like shopping for a pair of shoes--tell the clerk you are really interested and will come back later to buy them, then never return. People aren't shoes, tho. Its been a long time, but I called a man when I was no longer interested in dating to thank him. Same for job offers. Shows respect, IMO. But social ettiquete is a declining skill. "Oldskool", so to speak.

[jdawg24]

good for you man, stay cool!

[oldskool83]

my other date went fine, i think i had 3 with her already and ill see her again.