I just broke up with my girlfriend. Are my reasons justified?

[powers]

I am 26. She is 22. We had been dating for a year and a half. Her ex boyfriend has been texting her weekly for the past 3 months. He always texts late at night and every single text consists of him trying to get her to come over to hook up. I told her 3 months ago that i didnt want her to talk to him anymore.

Last night, he called her at 3 AM, lookin for a hook up. I had her show me her text messages and I found out that she secretely met up with him yesterday.

She asked him to hangout and smoke a blunt. She was the one who wanted to hang out. When I asked her earlier in the night what she did for the day, she didnt mention hanging out with him, ALONE at his house. She also told me that she was gonna cut a friends hair the next day, but she didnt tell me she was planning on going to HIS HOUSE to cut his hair.

She knew that I didnt like her talking to him, and she went behind my back and hung out with him ALONE at his house.

Remember, all this guy ever wants to do is hook up with her. What do you guys think about this situation?

[VincenzoG91]

Yeah, your reasons for breaking up are valid. She is either getting ready to cheat on you, or already cheating on you. She probably wasn't even sad about getting dumped. Forget her and you will meet someone better soon enough.

[smackie9]

What is there to justify? She is still fond of her ex obviously. She never got over him. You should have dumped her ass 3 months ago.

[powers]

Thanks for your responses. I am looking for more responses!!!!

[dem862]

I concur. At best, this girl is lying and deceitful. At worst, she has been cheating on you.

[smackie9]

There ain't a soul on these boards gonna say to you, you shouldn't have dumped her, that you could have given her the benefit of a doubt....no one.



And stop making her out to being all vulnerable, and easily taken advantage by this guy......she knows what she is doing, she knows what he's all about....and she is liking it.

[Saya]

You did the right thing by breaking up with her.
If she actually loves you and care about you then she wouldn't of text her ex or talk to him on the phone or go over to his house to meet him up.
I wouldn't ever do such a thing like that... if my ex ever contact me I would tell my bf about it and wouldn't reply back or even talk to him.
If my bf did the same thing then, I would be hurt and upset about it and he knows that I wouldn't like it so he hasn't contacted his ex while he has been in a relationship with me.

[Mathias]

I wouldn't ever do such a thing like that... if my ex ever contact me I would tell my bf about it and wouldn't reply back or even talk to him.
If my bf did the same thing then, I would be hurt and upset about it and he knows that I wouldn't like it so he hasn't contacted his ex while he has been in a relationship with me.

This is the proper expectation. Well done.

[bcgirl]

why do you think that he keeps messaging and texting her to hook up constantly?? Maybe it's because she actually does hook up with him and gives him what he wants?!!....sex, make-out sessions, his rocks off..... I highly doubt she is just hanging out with him alone sipping on tea and playing board games. Ofcourse you should have dumped her because she is playing you for a fool. Whatever you do, don't take her back and don't believe her bs that she will try to pull with you.

[andstuff]

so funny to read all the negative replies. its not like you owned her and was entitled to tell her what to do and what not to do.

if you didn't trust her then fine, but why pretend you're better than her? being a possessive scum is worse then being unwilling to commit to one properly.

where do all these men even come from thinking girls are obliged to love them the way they want? if she didn't love you enough, then the reason might be within yourself. apparently what you need is a submissive admiring idiot with zero personality. and oh not sought after by anyone else, safer that way isnt it?

[Wakeup]

So: Hows things "andstuff" are you still getting hit on by the old and washed-up?

There is absolutely no indication that Op is "a possessive scum" there is however, lots of indication that his (hopefully still) ex is wanting to cross a relationship boundary that is clearly a deal breaker for him. Absolutely nothing wrong or pretentious about that in the least. .. as noted by the majority.

Girls are not obligated to love a guy the way he wants.. just as the guys are not obligated to keep women in their lives who they've just discovered lies and disrespects.

[andstuff]

no, i'm not, they are scared of me, so i'm safe and far far away from their mouldy rotting decomposing 30-year-old bodies. but if you wanted to tell me how to avoid being looked at by every saliva-dripping male on the tube, it would be very welcome, because i'm uber-annoyed.

shouldn't it be a taboo - controlling phones and messaging or even picking up another person's phone to read messages? its like basic privacy and human freedom. people should get dumped for doing this

powers was free to do whatever he did, but why pretend he is the noble betrayed innocent that he isn't?

[smackie9]

So: Hows things "andstuff" are you still getting hit on by the old and washed-up?

There is absolutely no indication that Op is "a possessive scum" there is however, lots of indication that his (hopefully still) ex is wanting to cross a relationship boundary that is clearly a deal breaker for him. Absolutely nothing wrong or pretentious about that in the least. .. as noted by the majority.

Girls are not obligated to love a guy the way he wants.. just as the guys are not obligated to keep women in their lives who they've just discovered lies and disrespects.

I agree. There has to be respect and some boundaries in place. If what you are doing is kept a secret from your partner, then it means you shouldn't be doing it.....in cases like this.