feeling of pressure for the title

**oldskool83** · 31-01-12, 04:06 AM

Been seeing a girl who wants me as her b/f. We talked alittle about it and I had said I feel no need to rush anything because after a month I'm still deciding if she's datable material...can't figure somone out in 2 or 3 weeks. She kept bringing up the meet my dad deal, so I did. Family seems nice. shes 26, I'm 28.

I've had some bad experiances rushing stuff with women with kids so I'd rather chill a little and go at what ever the pace is.

She did say she would wait as long as she has to for me....I kinda find that funny since I see her on average 3 times a week normaly at least.

Do some women just want the "offical title" more then seeing if the guy is really a good match? Shes stated she wants me, maybe I'm more on the fence trying to give her a shot since I normaly go for wildly easy women and it always ends up I'm single again so I tried somthing different.

I guess now I kinda feel pressured a little and in the past I've peaced once I feel pressured. There's no competition, she just wants the title...went to extent of using a picture of "us" and changed her FB profile pic. I myself have stayed away from FB because I just don't need that crap in my life, only check if someone finds me etc.

She says things like do you want me? I told her I wanted some time. Last time I asked a girl to be my g/f after 2 months I got shot down big time and I'm wondering if thats affecting kinda now. I'm over the girl who shot me down and still see her few times a month due to where she works and me bing a home improvement shopper, but I don't go to see or talk with her anymore. I'm solely seeing this girl but normally use to women getting stupid after 1-2 months and this new girl does seem different.

How can I let my guard down more to her and let her into my life more so I can be her b/f because she is good hearted and after all thats whats gonna last right?

lil advice thats all thanks

**Cerby** · 31-01-12, 06:42 AM

It sounds like you're not ready for a relationship. You can usually determine if someone is dateable after a few days, if you're taking months to decide then the reality is that you're just biding your time until someone better comes along. Usually after a month you should be able to decide if you wan't to be exlcusive or not. She wants it, you don't. . .

If you feel pressured for something you're not ready for, then walk away. Its fair to both you and her.

sadie_genie · 31-01-12, 08:18 AM

Cerby is right. It sounds to me like you don't want the commitment. From a female's point of view, knowing whether a guy wants the title tells you whether the guy is looking for a serious relationship or just playing the field. It is kind of a test.

**smackie9** · 31-01-12, 09:18 AM

Dude I understand you want to see if you can trust this girl, because of all those flakes you had to deal with in the last while. She just wants to know how serious you are about her. So if you explain to her honestly about your experiences, I'm sure she will just smile confidently and say, take your time I will be here when you are ready.

**bcgirl** · 31-01-12, 12:15 PM

well she oozes desperation. Usually women with kids will want a father figure in their lives for their child. They don't have the time to go party it up anymore and meet and date many men.....so the first good catch they meet (you), she wants to reel you in fast before you run for the hills like the rest of them that find out she is a single mother. She is tired of the dating scene and wants to just settle down and play house.... i don't think she wants "the title" because that is what highschool girls who has never had a boyfriend wants. She wants a baby's daddy and husband....not just some boyfriend.

**misombra** · 31-01-12, 12:33 PM

Could someone please shove their penis into bcgirls mouth? Thanks in advance.

**bcgirl** · 31-01-12, 12:40 PM

I will edit all of your moronic posts and we shall see who is whose puppet.

**IndiReloaded** · 31-01-12, 02:43 PM

Originally Posted by bcgirl

well she oozes desperation. Usually women with kids will want a father figure in their lives for their child. They don't have the time to go party it up anymore and meet and date many men.....so the first good catch they meet (you), she wants to reel you in fast before you run for the hills like the rest of them that find out she is a single mother. She is tired of the dating scene and wants to just settle down and play house.... i don't think she wants "the title" because that is what highschool girls who has never had a boyfriend wants. She wants a baby's daddy and husband....not just some boyfriend.

This post does seem a rather unnecessary generalization. LOL for Miso's response.

Karma, bcgirl.

**Boisdevie** · 31-01-12, 04:36 PM

Originally Posted by bcgirl

well she oozes desperation. Usually women with kids will want a father figure in their lives for their child. They don't have the time to go party it up anymore and meet and date many men.....so the first good catch they meet (you), she wants to reel you in fast before you run for the hills like the rest of them that find out she is a single mother. She is tired of the dating scene and wants to just settle down and play house.... i don't think she wants "the title" because that is what highschool girls who has never had a boyfriend wants. She wants a baby's daddy and husband....not just some boyfriend.

What a load of absolute bullsh1te. My former partner had a kid and your comments are way off the mark. My current partner has 2 children and your comments are still way off the mark.

**oldskool83** · 31-01-12, 07:35 PM

i dont want involvement with the kid, kid has a dad, i dont need to be dad. i also dont need to do everything and anything for the kid either. that can come later.....only every now and then if i go over do i see the kid and its normaly to take him back to dad.

while some women with kids are desparate others are not. yes she just wants to settle down she told me.

**bulrush** · 31-01-12, 07:56 PM

I think meeting the parents is a great idea. By knowing the parents you can usually tell how messed up the kid is going to be. If the parents are just in a foul mood, that affected their kids, who will likely be pretty messed up in one way or another.

Always meet the parents early in the relationship.

**oldskool83** · 31-01-12, 08:38 PM

parents are nice and reserved, girls same way, the baby dad...no clue. he got a new girl prego while he they were married so yeah. shes divorced now.

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