Need some advice about a complicated situation with a friend

[spiggy567]

I've posted some stuff about this before lol, but some more help would be nice. So basically, I am crazy about one of my friends. I'm in college and she is in high school. When we were both In high school she literally showed every sign that she was interested in me. She somehow got my number and started texting me and would talk to me and flirt with me instead of her close friends that were in the same class. We texted and talked a lot, like a ton more than I did with other girls who were just my friends, and even more then the girl who is one of my best friends. I met her somewhat late in the school year and we hung out occasionally over the first half of summer. Always flrting etc. and continued to txt a ton. Eventually, we were both drunk at a concert and she randomly kissed me out of nowhere. We talked about it after, and she said it was just because she was drunk and she just viewed me as a friend, but this may have been simply because I was going to college in a month and viewed a relationship as unrealistic...so I don't know. Interestingly, After this happened, we talked and texted more than ever before and the week before I left for college she said she wanted to hangout every day and we did. It was just me and her most of the the time. We were literally almost txting, talking or hanging out that last week of summer, When I was at college I confessed my feelings for her. She said she just wanted to be friends and I was hurt and even got a little mad at her.

Eventually, a month later she texted me saying she apologized for teasing me but that we could still be friends. I agreed and we started talking and flirting a lot again. and whenever I came home she was always desperate to hang out with me. Literally begged me to hang out with her for two hours and even cried a little. I tried to play hard to get and she was really upset when I decided to hang out with my friends over her. Then, over winter break she was once again desperate to hang out with me, and she even asked me out on a lunch date with just the two of us. I know this is kind of a "friend" thing to do but it was interesting considering the circumstances. Whenever we hung out she was always touching me, hitting me, flirting with me. She would ask me to pick her up and hold her and would even bite me lol. I was afraid to make a move despite how clear it seemed she was romantically interested, because she said we were just friends. I still had strong feelings for her and when I went back for college I said we should not be friends anymore and not talk, because I would continue to be hung up on her. I eventually regretted this and made attempts to talk to her and she ignored me. Honestly, probably a good move by her, I know she cares about me and wants me to move on and she knows I just wanna be friends with her because I'm so crazy about her and want her in my life.

My question is, do you think the reason she doesn't wanna be more than friends is because we are so far apart now for most of the year, due to me being at college? I know there are some other guys back home she is interested in who may seem more accesible and convenient then me. and do you think if I made a solid effort to show her how much she meant to me she would be with me? She hasn't gave our distance as a reason for not wanting more, but I feel like she just isn't saying it, because she doesn't wanna complicate stuff between us, and she thinks it would never work. At college I have had plenty of interest by some really attractive and cool girls, but none of them are as girlfriend material as this first girl. I know that it is usually dumb to try to seem desperate and try to win over a girl who views you as just a friend as you will never be able to convince them otherwise, I just feel this might be a unique situation where it might work. Lol I am really drunk right now and this usually doesnt bother me, so pardon the possible idiocy.

[smackie9]

When you are hung up on someone all you see is what you want, and not the obvious part that she is not interested. Her on the other hand is a attention whore......you satisfy her emotional needs.....to some girls this stems from low self esteem, not desire. She knows she is using you for that, because she apologized for leading you on. You can see how futile this all has been and you should stop letting your feelings control you like this......in other words snap out of it.