Feeling like somebody is too good for you?

[xhayatox]

Is it normal to feel this way? Have any of you ever met somebody so overwhelmingly amazing that you felt so inferior to them, and you felt like you could never have a chance with them? Where do feelings like this come from? And what's the best approach?

[pisces25]

Putting someone on a pedestal is dangerous and delusional. No one is better or worse than anyone else, just different.

I would suggest it's a lack of confidence on your behalf rather than her/his 'amazingness' that is making you feel this way.

[THX]

Your approach should be to explore the reasons you feel like you are inferior to them. Secondly are those reasons your own values or societies. You have to sift out self expectations and address those primarily if not exclusively. In the mean time don't sabotage your relationship with the person. Often we judge ourselves much harsher than those around us. It is completely possible for two people to be in a relationship and they both think the other is too good for them.

If you communicate with yourself that you are not good enough then you will leak this to the other person and soon they may believe it as well. The question is how do we believe that which we do not believe? This is where accepting yourself where you are comes into play. It's a clean slate on which you will build a case THROUGH ACTION that although you may not yet be where you want to be you are well on your way.

In the end someone being "too good" is a purely subjective assessment. One must ask, "By what criteria has this determination been reached?' Defining and addressing those criteria is where your solution lye's.

[xhayatox]

Your approach should be to explore the reasons you feel like you are inferior to them. Secondly are those reasons your own values or societies. You have to sift out self expectations and address those primarily if not exclusively. In the mean time don't sabotage your relationship with the person. Often we judge ourselves much harsher than those around us. It is completely possible for two people to be in a relationship and they both think the other is too good for them.

If you communicate with yourself that you are not good enough then you will leak this to the other person and soon they may believe it as well. The question is how do we believe that which we do not believe? This is where accepting yourself where you are comes into play. It's a clean slate on which you will build a case THROUGH ACTION that although you may not yet be where you want to be you are well on your way.

In the end someone being "too good" is a purely subjective assessment. One must ask, "By what criteria has this determination been reached?' Defining and addressing those criteria is where your solution lye's.

Great post. There is this one girl in particular that I am infatuated with, and I feel highly inferior to her for several reasons.

1. She has a great successful career. She possesses skills that I can only dream to have. I can only wish I was as capable as her.
2. She is extremely attractive and the thought of her having any interest in a guy like me is laughable.
3. She carrys herself very well as a person. Doesn't feel the need to seek validation and doesn't feel the need to be anybody but herself.

Overall, yeah. She just has so much that I don't.. I am not particularly good at anything in life. I don't have a job, I have very little hobbies. Everything I pick up, I lose interest in quickly and I can't sustain a hobby long enough for that reason. I am not as capable as I would like to be. I am generally lazy and am not really productive. I just don't have the strength to carry myself enough like her. She is everything I'm not.. I guess that's why I feel so inferior to her. I just have trouble identifying with who I am as a person. I have a great deal of internal conflict that I'm trying to address but it seems so futile. I just wish I was more capable like her.

[pisces25]

How do you know she didn't go through the same internal conflict as you to get where she is? It's good you have recognised some areas of your life which need improvement so just concentrate on that rather than comparing to other people. And don't think that if someone like her was to want a relationship with you your life would be complete and you'd be happy coz it ain't the case. Fix yourself up and then you will exude the same vibes.